There must be something about this time of year, but I found myself needing to reread this post I wrote about this same time last year. I pray it's helpful to you as well...
It's been quite a week. Don't get me wrong, nothing major has happened, and I am very much grateful and blessed; yet, I find myself at times feeling overwhelmed. I wake up trying to focus on God and His goodness and how I can be a light throughout the day, and then I leave my house and the world attacks. It's not big things, just little jabs hour by hour and day by day. I don't know if this means that God wants me to change my environment or to do something different. So, I have prayed and tried to seek new opportunities, but nothing has materialized. I just don't know what to do. In times like these, all we can do is heed the words of Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I am God." Or, as The MessageBible reads, "Stop striving..." and know. We can tire ourselves out struggling and striving to figure God out or we can sit back and watch Him work things out. I know it's easier said than done, but I am praying that I can make it a reality in my life, and if you are struggling, that you can do the same in yours. What do you do when you don't know what to do? Nothing...be still. Ms. EV
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I spend a lot of time reflecting on my life, not dwelling, but taking glimpses in the past to see what worked and what did not. Not only and I trying to avoid my past mistakes, but I am also looking for how the lessons I have learned can be a blessing to someone else. When I see someone headed down a familiar path, I cannot just stand by and watch them step in front of an oncoming train of heartache and disappointment. I feel I have to say or do something to get his or her attention. Now, I have learned that the person will not always listen to me, which is fine, hurtful, but fine. Sometimes in life we have to learn lessons for ourselves in order for them to stick. I mean, honestly, I don’t always listen to my warnings, so I can be mad when someone else ignores me. Nevertheless, I hope this blog will continue to help me and will help someone else who is trying to stay on the path to his or her dreams because I have discovered how to get everything you want in life.
Step One: Offer honor and respect where it’s due Step Two: Believe in God’s Word [O]ur God’s Word stands firm and forever. …Just as rain and snow descend from the skies and don’t go back until they’ve watered the earth, doing their work of making things grow and blossom, producing seed for farmers and food for the hungry, so will the words that come out of My mouth not come back empty-handed. They’ll do the work I sent them to do, they’ll complete the assignment I gave them. Isaiah 40:8; Isaiah 55:10-11 MSG Many people are used to empty promises. We have either made them or gotten them from others. The beauty of being a child of the Most High King is that everything God says, He does. His Word is bond. God cannot lie and He cannot fail. So, why is it so hard to believe what He says and take Him at His Word? We seem to have no problem in believing the claims of promotional products or prominent public figures. Yet, we question the God who has kept every promise He has ever made. If we want to get everything we desire in life, we must believe God’s Word is true. This is not just about the promises written in the Bible, this is also about believing the promises that God has written on your heart. If you have a dream that you have walked away from because you felt that you could not accomplish it, yet it seems the dream will not die, there is a good chance that God placed that desire within you. He does not want you to give up on that which He has promised you, God wants you to believe in His promises and lean on Him. You do the possible and He will do the impossible. I shudder to think about how many times I was on the brink of achieving a goal and I gave up a moment too soon because I did not trust that God had my best interests in mind. When God breathes a dream, a promise into us, it is not meant to wither and die. It will not leave you empty-handed, or worse yet, empty-hearted. Let God’s Word work in and through your life. If you are not sure if your dream is a self-made dream or a God-breathed promise, compare it to His Word. God’s will for your life and His Word will never contradict one another. If your dream allows you to honor and respect God, first and foremost, and build up His Kingdom, don’t put it down because you can’t accomplish it on your own. That is exactly where God wants you to be. He needs us to get to the end of ourselves, so that we must trust and believe in His Word. After my book, Pray While You’re Prey, did not meet the goals I felt it should meet, I not only gave up on the book. I gave up on writing altogether. The desire to write persisted, but I thought that if no publisher would publish my and if people didn’t buy my books, then my writing was worthless and pointless. I gave up. But, I felt even more empty after I quit writing. I also felt overwhelmed because God was pouring wisdom into my spirit. Some was just for me, but some was meant to be shared. And, I, because things weren’t going my way, chose to believe Satan’s lies rather than God’s Word, so I had given up on writing, which was the very outlet that God had given me. It was one way in which He would use me. Once I started believing that writing was a dream God had placed on my heart again. He showed me how I could use the gift. Now, I feel full, closer to Him, and I am not burdened with too much information or with feeling like a failure. I believe that every word God gives to me has a purpose. I do not need to know that purpose; I just need to believe in God’s Word enough to allow Him to use me. What have you given up on because you don’t believe God can make it happen? Whose words do you believe over Gods? Family? Friends? Strangers? Satan? There is no one who will be 100% real with you the way God can. So, if you want to get everything you want in life, you have to believe in God’s Word. Tomorrow, I will continue with this discussion of how to get everything you want in life, so stay tuned…Ms. EV This past Sunday, during the opening of worship, we sang the “More than Enough” by The Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir. The words are:
Jehovah Jireh, my Provider You are more than enough for me Jehovah Rapha, you’re my Healer By Your stripes, I’ve been set free Jehovah Shammah, You are with me You supply all my needs You’re more than enough More than enough More than enough for me As the song continued, I began to envision that I was all alone singing for an audience of One. I felt as though I was sitting at the feet of Jesus singing this song of praise to Him. But, as I continued to sing, I felt a stir in my spirit asking me if I truly believed what I was singing. Do I really consider God, my Savior, to be more than enough? If He never did anything else for me, would I still lift my hands in praise or would I hang my head in defeat? I think that all of us would love to shout “Yes! Lord, no matter what happens to me, You have already done more than enough!” And, that is true. I fully understand that God does not owe me anything. He has already poured so much grace and mercy over my life that I did not deserve. Yet, there are still times when I want more. Can we sing or say that God is more than enough and continue to ask Him for more and more? If we ask God to bless us, does it mean that we do not believe that He is our everything? I don’t believe that taking your concerns, your thoughts, your dreams, and your prayers to God means that you devalue everything else that God has done. It does not mean that salvation was not enough. Jesus said, in John 10:10, that He has come to give us life more abundantly. That kind of life means that whether we have plenty or whether the world would consider us to be poor, God still reigns on the throne in our hearts. We contradict ourselves when we say that God is more than enough, but then, we try to do His job for Him. We are not being true to God when we say that He is more than enough, but we hang our heads in defeat at every time we get a bid of bad news. This earth is not our home, so we will always have a longing for something greater. There is no need to be ashamed of that. But, we must never be ashamed of our God. We must never think that there is any challenge to great for God. ‘More than enough’ does not meant we should never ask God for anything because that directly contradicts His Word. ‘More than enough’ is the character of God. When we do make our requests known to Him, He not only answers them, but He answers them in the best way for us. He gives us more than we asked for, even when He says, “No” or “Wait” because the denial or the delay always leads to something greater than we imagine. So, if you are thinking that you cannot sing, “You’re more than enough for me,” because you are still asking God to bless and keep you, don’t let the devil convince you of that lie. Hold your head up and shout it from the rooftops! My God is more than enough! My God is more than able! My God has already given me His best and will continue to do so! And, don’t just sing or shout it, mean it and believe it. Ms. EV Even though growing up, all I ever dreamed of was becoming an attorney, I very quickly realized that it was not the career for me. Because my life had been so geared toward that goal, it was then that I really had to start listening to God’s promptings. And, I was not always great at listening. Nonetheless, when you are faced with the fact that you no longer have the one consistent desire that you have had for most of your life, the best and safest place to turn is to God. So, I prayed. Lord, show me the right career. Lord, give me the financial stability and freedom that I need. Lord, bless me with a family of my own.
Each and everyday, I would pray to God for what I wanted. There is nothing wrong with asking God for your desires. He encourages us to ask, to seek, and to knock. I truly believe that my current career is where God wants me to be. However, the road is not always easy. Every year, as with almost every other industry, the game is changed. There are more and different demands, sometimes with less incentive and one really has to examine the true motivation behind the work. Last year, in the midst of anger, I made a decision to give up a source of income. Before I notified my superiors of my decision, I prayed and sought after God because I have learned not to make rash decisions out of anger and not to make any decision before I pray about it. Though I made the decision, it took two months of praying and listening before I announced the decision. And, I feel that I listened and it was the right thing to do. Still, the enemy wants to cause confusion and second guessing. As I said, this particular venture was a source of income; not a significant amount of income, but something extra. I realized that the time I was spending on this job could be spent pursuing the passions that God has placed in me, which would lead to a more joyful and peaceful existence created by a blissful balance of work and play. I started to record music, continued to write, and took on some catering and coordinating jobs, which are all things that I love to do. But, the things that I love to do aren’t replacing the little extra that I was making. I thought that there would be another opportunity that would not take up much time, but provide me with extra income; however that does not seem to be a possibility anymore. So, the devil wants me to start questioning whether or not I made the right decision. And, I give him credit because he is good at his job. He knows to throw in, “Now, you’re not just a lonely spinster, but you’re going to lose what little luxury you could afford. The only thing that made being alone bearable was that you could afford to treat yourself.” I will admit that I was letting him win. Then, I went and grabbed some of my notes that I keep around the house when I need inspiration. The first two things I read didn’t seem to speak to the current issue, but then I saw a quote that I copied from my dad’s “Courageous” calendar. It said, “I used to ask God for all kinds of things; now, I just ask for God and He takes care of all things.” The beauty of being His child is that I know He will provide. I do not need to seek the provision; I only need to seek the face of the Provider. I know I listened. Even though, I thought I was making a decision because of hurt feelings, when it came down to it, I believe that God allowed things to become uncomfortable, so that I would free myself up to be used by Him. I know that God is faithful and He knows my every need and He has NEVER failed me. So, I choose to ask for more of Him, to seek Him, and to knock at His door, knowing He will take care of ALL things! Ms. EV For the past couple of days, I have been writing about those things that God sees that we either choose not to see or that we really could not see. I have been talking about trusting that God knows everything and He knows what is best. So, of course, the current attack in my life has to do with not knowing a piece of information.
I have some very important deadlines coming up pretty soon. In order for me to meet my obligations, there is a key piece of information that I need. I searched the Internet for an answer. I found nothing. I e-mailed a person who I thought would know. She told me to e-mail another person who should know. That person said she didn’t know and copied my question to someone who was doing the job of the person who would know the answer to my question. That person e-mailed me back and said someone else was in charge of the information, but she would not tell me the name of said person, so that I could make contact. I got frustrated. Then, I heard, “Trust Me.” And, I whined, “God, I do trust You, but I still wanna know!” I almost feel like God laughed at me and I can’t blame Him. I am convinced that He has an awesome sense of humor. Don’t get distracted by trying to figure out what my question was about; just pay close attention. We cannot say we trust God and have to know every step of the plan at the same time. If you are a control freak like I am, then you understand this struggle. I know it is wrong. I know I have to just trust God. Yet, I still find myself trying to figure out certain things. The beautiful thing is that God knows exactly who I am and He loves me in spite of my shortcomings. I believe that I could not get anyone to give me the answer to my question and I ran into a dead end, so that God could get my attention focused back on trusting Him. There are so many examples in my life that I could point to where I trusted God and He came through for me in inexplicable ways. It’s actually kind of crazy that in my search for answers, I seem to forget about all of those times. The good news is that I am growing in my faith and I can recognize when I am going off the track of trust. Do I still wanna know the answer to my question? You betcha! But, as Job said, “Yet will I trust Him!” I probably wouldn’t understand the answer if He let me know anyway. When you know God, you don’t have to know all of the answers! Ms. EV I entered a Twitter contest last week that offered four floor seats to the local ABA team, the Jacksonville Giants. Much to my surprise, when I got home, I had a message saying that I had won the tickets. I am not a huge basketball fan. I usually only watch my nephews play and I watch March Madness and the NBA playoffs. But, since I won free tickets and it gave me something to do on a Saturday night, I went to the game.
ABA basketball is a little bit different than NBA and I noticed in the program that they have a rule called the 3D rule. This rule means that if the defending team steals the ball before the offensive team crosses half court, the next shot is worth three points instead of two. So, the teams often incorporate a full court press into the defense, which means they start defending the ball as soon as the other team is awarded possession rather than waiting until they cross the half court. When I was reading about the rule, I thought that this is a good strategy to employ when we are trying to reach our dreams and goals. Many times, when we are going after our dreams, we leave it up to others to bring us the resources we need, or we wait for the perfect plan, the perfect chance to arise to take what we have been after. We set up our defenses and try to prevent anything bad from happening. The thing about a full court press as opposed to a traditional half court defense is that if the offensive player gets past the press, the team on offense generally outnumbers the team on defense and they may have an easier chance to score. But, if the defensive team can get the ball away, they usually have a one-on-one shot at the basket and can score easily. It is a risk versus reward thing. We have to ask ourselves, “Am I ready to fully press in? Am I ready to press into the loving arms of God and step out in faith, knowing He has everything under control? Or will I sit back with my defenses up and just wait to see how things go? Am I willing to risk failing in order to ultimately be successful?” I can only answer those questions for myself. However, I do know that doing things the same way and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity. So, for me, I have to be willing to try a more aggressive approach every once in awhile. This is not done without praying first. I will not take the step if I feel that God, my coach if you will, has not given me the signal to go after it. And, when I listen, if I don’t get the expected results, I know there is something can learn from it. If my attempt is successful, I might get a little more than I even expected. That, to me, is a win-win situation. It is a lesson I wish I had learned and put into practice long ago. Nevertheless, the past is gone and I can only focus on how I approach my dreams in the future. Another lesson I learned from the ABA 3D rule was that teams will employ the full court press even when they are far ahead in points. Sometimes, when we are successful, we are even less motivated to take a risk than we are when we have failed. I feel like this is when God takes the opportunity to shake up our comfort zone and force us to do something radically different; something that requires that we fully press into our faith and trust in Him. So, when approaching your dreams and goals don’t be afraid to try a full court press. Start attacking from the start, create your own opportunities, and at the very least, you will show the devil and the world that you are serious about your plans. At the very most, you will show God that you trust in His plan. Ms. EV I was challenged by a Girlfriends in God devotional in my inbox and here is my response. I hope that it can bless and encourage you about the storms in your life. Check out Girlfriends in God when you have a chance .
Challenge: Read 1 Peter 4:12-13 "Do not be surprised at the painful things you are now suffering. These things are testing your faith." (ICB) In your own words, describe the testing you are going through today in your life. How is it testing and strengthening your faith? Response: My main tests are being single and childless. I never thought that I would survive four years of singleness. But, I reached four years last June and I am thankful because God proved to me that, with Him, I can survive. I will be alright. I thought the depression of being alone might kill me when I was younger. It was that thought that twisted my mind into thinking that getting married very young was a good idea. If I took the opportunity then to get married, I wouldn’t have to ever be alone again. But, because I didn’t listen to God, I experienced an even more painful loneliness. I experienced feeling alone while in a relationship, a marriage. The heartache is even more brutal when you are alone and attached at the same time. Morally, it is wrong to seek comfort in another person while you are married, so you either have to continue to battle loneliness and become a young divorcee (which was the ultimate failure in my book at the time) or commit adultery. I did the latter. I am not proud of it and it led to even more pain because not only was I being rejected by my husband, the man who I sought for comfort also rejected me because he lost respect for me. How could either of them respect me when I didn’t even respect myself? All of this was the result of me not wanting to be alone. Nevertheless, praise God that I realized that I am never alone. The loneliness that made me cry to myself to sleep at times is the very thing that pushes me into the arms of the Master. When I was younger, I didn’t want children. As a child, I didn’t get along with other children, and I felt my time was better spent on achieving my goals. So, when I had a pregnancy scare at eighteen, I prayed, “God, I would rather not be pregnant now and never have children, than to be a teen mother.” Unmarried, teenage mothers were looked down upon. I was one of the people looking down upon them, and now, I was the one who might be in their shoes. At eighteen, it seemed like a harmless prayer because I didn’t want kids and I never thought that I would. When I got married, for the few months that we were happy, I could see myself having my husband’s babies and we weren’t trying to get pregnant, but we weren’t not trying either. I am grateful that I didn’t have his child and I know that there were a lot of prayers from people who loved me and saw what I could not see that help that to happen. I have had several health issues that are threats to my fertility and every year when I see the doctor, I get a little nudge that I might want to think about when I am going to start a family because I am running out time before I am high risk. But I am not even dating anyone, let alone married. And, I do not want children by myself. I want a family. I want a husband and then children, which is what I wanted when I was younger, but I went about it in all kinds of wrong ways. That subconscious prayer haunts me and tests me every time I start feeling my maternal instincts. Did God listen to that prayer or did He realize I was being ridiculous? I have asked for forgiveness and I have to believe that He has forgiven me for the sin and the request. So, now I wait on a husband on a child. Whether it happens or not, He is still God. He still knows what is best for me. I believe that my desire to love children has helped me grow into a better aunt and a patient teacher. And, should I have children, I have learned lessons from watching other parents for such a long time, that though I am sure I will still make mistakes, maybe they will be few. I have asked God to take the desires to be married and have children away from me several times. I say, “God, if it’s never going to happen, I am fine with that plan for my life, but please take the desires away.” They haven’t gone anywhere, so these trials are testing and strengthening my faith. I have to believe that God’s Word is true when it says that if I delight in Him, He will give me the desires of my heart. The more time I am without a husband and children who may break my focus, the more time I can dedicate to God; the more I can learn to delight myself in Him constantly and consistently, so that my family will be an addition to my abundant life not a substitution for God’s presence in my life. Challenge: Read 2 Corinthians 6:6 (NLT) "We have proved ourselves by our purity, our understanding, our patience, our kindness, our sincere love, and the power of the Holy Spirit." This verse lists the qualities God wants to create in us through storms that come our way. Which ones are present in your life? Which ones is He trying to produce in you today? Are you willing to let Him do so? Response: The qualities that these storms have produces in my life are purity. I am not inclined to mess up on that again. I have made the mistake enough times to know that God does not bless disobedience. I have developed an understanding of who God is, how God loves and what God wants from His children. I very much feel the power of the Holy Spirit working in my life and being a Comforter and a Guide. I have grown more patient, but I can still grow in that area. I am a kind-hearted person, I have learned how to be softer and gentler, but I do still have a short fuse that contradicts with what is actually in my heart. I am willing to let God continue the work that He has started and I know that He will finish. His Word tells me so. I know that when He knows I am ready, He will move me forward to the next step in my life. Ms. EV Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you had a problem, but you knew the solution was unlikely to happen? I have. In fact, I struggled with something just this week that fit into that category. I say all the time that God wants to hear all of our problems, big or small. Even if others might not think it an issue, if you are His and it is an issue to you, it is an issue to Him. So, I started praying about this problem. Stop being nosey; I am not going to say what the problem was (I keep SOME things to myself...LOL).
I knew what a great solution to the problem would be. I knew it was highly unlikely to get the outcome I envisioned, but God is able to do the impossible. So, I kept praying...the same prayer...over and over and over again. "Lord, let this happen so that my problem can go away. And, please let it happen soon." Days went by and I thought my head would explode because the problem persisted and I was pretty sure that God was saying "no" to my request for assistance. Then, in the middle of praying the same prayer, "Lord, I just need You...," I paused. And, then I thought about it. That was the perfect place to stop. Instead of telling God how to fix my problem, I just needed to say, "Lord, I need You!" After praying that prayer, I started to feel some relief from the situation, but it still lingered. I knew that God was on it, so I added to the prayer, "Dear God, just be You for me." I thought I knew the solution to the problem; an improbable solution, but one that would change the circumstances surrounding me. God is showing me that my circumstances don't need to change. I just need to trust Him to change me and how I view the circumstance and how I view what He is capable of doing. He knows everything. And, He knows everything we need. So, I continue to pray and I invite you to pray, "Lord, I just need You. Dear God, just be You." Ms. EV Yesterday was Veterans Day; today is the day that it is observed around the nation. As the daughter, sister, and niece of so many veterans, I have to take the time to say how grateful I am to those who have served and continue to serve in this great nation's armed forces. I know that I am not brave enough to make the sacrifices that these courageous men and women chose to make to protect my freedoms. I feel a very personal sense of gratitude towards everyone and anyone who has ever risked life and limb to fight for me, without even knowing me.
I am also grateful for the One who fought for me, even though He knew me. He knew exactly who I was and who I would become. He knew every trial I would face and every triumph I would gain. He knew every mistake I would make and every miracle I would need. Yet, He still fought for me. He knew that I would sometimes have doubts about if He was listening. He knew that sometimes I would have deficiencies in my learning. Nevertheless, He fought for me. Most would think that the biggest battle for me would be with the devil, but honestly, I think He had to fight me harder for me than He ever had to fight the devil. But, He fought for me. He died for me. He rose for me. He keeps me day by day. Even on a day like today, when I wake up feeling defeated, He gently whispers to me, "I'm fighting for you. You have not and you will not lose the battle. It is not your battle to lose; it is my battle and I never lose. Just hold on tight to My unchanging hand. You will make it!" The men and women who volunteer to serve this great country are worthy of honor. Whether they serve for one year or thirty years, they are willing to make a sacrifice that I cannot say that I was ever willing to make. So, I salute them! And, I give thanks and praise to the God who made them and made them so very brave. This same God who made them willing to fight for you and me also fights for you and me daily. We just have to turn the battles over to Him and let Him win! Ms. EV It was ten o'clock and I was watching television with one eye open. Though the polls in Florida were closed at seven, because of the long lines, the votes had not been counted completely. The screen on nearly every channel had a huge map of the United States and every few minutes a state would turn red or blue. The talking heads pontificated about which states would go which way. It was interesting to see, as I flipped through the channels, all of the different ways people could say the same thing.
At some point, I fell asleep on my couch. I thought about whether or not I should go to be or wait up like I did for the last election. The last election had the potential of creating history, so I think that is one reason that I was glued to my television in 2008. I thought about how I should pay attention in case my students had questions on how things work, but the system has not changed in 200 years, just the details. So, I brushed my teeth, said my prayers and went to bed. I realized that I could honestly care less about who won the election. I had cast my vote based on my convictions, but so did millions of other people. Thos votes were translated into electoral votes and there would be a winner and a loser, but I genuinely could not think of a reason to care who won. So, I went to bed. And. I slept peacefully, except for the few moments when I randomly woke up and tried to figure out what my nephew's chances of winning homecoming king are (an election that I feel much more passionate about). I know my position may not be popular. And, trust that I do not knock political involvement or enthusiasm. Nevertheless, as I tried to force my eyes open for another hour of election coverage, I thought, "Will the outcome of this election really change my destiny?" My answer was an emphatic "No!" I had been around for presidents of both parties, united and divided governments, recessions, wars, terrorism, and I have never felt like any one person was more in control of my life than God. There has never been an outcome of an election that has changed my life for the better or worse. Yes, some decisions by political leaders have affected my daily life, but God has been my Provider and my Protection through every circumstance. Like I said yesterday, I will always vote and make my voice heard. I believe God intends for us to be active participants in our government to the extent available. I just do not believe in trusting man more than God, so, I went to sleep. God never sleeps or slumbers; therefore, it did not matter the outcome because I have peace in Him. Ms. EV |
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