So one morning, I was accused (in a backhanded way) of being too nice, which is funny because usually people are telling me I am too hard on others. But apparently, it's not fair to those want want to be mean just for the heck of it when other people are nice because it makes them look bad. In any case, the whole situation boiled down to grace and mercy. Just how many chances should we give people? When are they going to learn their lesson and do what's right?
Then, I read one devotional that spoke about Hosea and Gomer. It spoke of how Hosea had to forgive his wife, the prostitute who had been unfaithful to him and even buy her back. Talk about grace and mercy. That piece of history in the Bible illustrates God's love for the Israelites and foreshadows Jesus' sacrifice for us. Then, my verse of the day was Matthew 7:12 [The Golden Rule] "Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets." Two unrelated Biblical truths that gave answers to my questions. And, as if, God didn't drive home the point already, He showed me another illustration of how grace and mercy works in my own life. There are five children on this earth that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt would do anything for because I love them unconditionally. I want the best for them. I know I cannot make decisions for them, but I try to be sure that they know all of their options, so they can make good choices. They don't always choose the best, and most certainly don't always pick what I would have chosen; nevertheless, my love for them never decreases and if I have to, I will help them pick up the pieces and start over or move on. This is and everyday example in my life of the type of love God has for us. I praise Him that His love is unconditional. He gives us free will and the opportunity to make sound decisions and He wants the best for us. When we make mistakes, He is loving enough to let us fall, so that we can learn, and then pick us up and help us keep moving. Grace and mercy. It doesn't mean that you're a doormat for Jesus being taken advantage of by hapless ne'er-do-wells. Sometimes you have to let people fall, but then, don't stand there and laugh, when they reach for your hand, help them get up and keep moving. Grace and mercy. His never ends. Should ours? Ms. EV
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This weekend, my sorority’s chapter celebrated its 20th anniversary with a reunion. It was a great opportunity for me to visit my old college campus and reminisce with old friends while making some new acquaintances. I had a great time, though, at first, I was a little disoriented. The school has grown and changed so much; I hardly recognized it. There were new buildings everywhere and I couldn’t seem to find the old familiar spots that I had once known. I guess I should have probably visited the campus more than twice in the past fifteen years. Once I got my bearings, though, I had a fantastic time. I felt nineteen again! When my line sisters and friends started showing up, it was as if we all fell back into our old roles and time had stood still.
As I was leaving, I passed by my old townhouse and some old hangouts, and I just had to thank God. Now, this isn’t going to be one of those times when I spill all of my business, but let’s just say God is a keeper. And, boy did He keep me. He kept me from death, danger, and destruction. As I drove off that campus and down the street and recalled some of the absolutely stupid things I did as a college student, I couldn’t help but praise Him for second chances (and third ones and fourth ones and twenty-fifth ones). It’s not that being saved gives us a license to sin and do crazy things. There are always consequences. I feel as if I still deal with some consequences for choices I made in my past. But, and thank God, that with my God, there is always a ‘but,’ God can and will deliver you when you are willing to take His hand and follow His lead. I am grateful for the old school me because she taught the present me a lot of valuable lessons. I pray that by being open and honest with the next generation, I can help them avoid some of my mistakes, but, even if they don’t, I can at least show them how God will turn your life around. Ms. EV I was reading through some past journal entries the other day and I ran across this little mini-poem:
“It may be me one day, but right now it is not; I have to keep my focus on what I have got.” I cannot remember what prompted that little message of encouragement. It could have been anything. Perhaps, I read a devotional on thankfulness. Maybe I saw an article about a wedding. It is possible that I saw someone who is very wealthy on television. There is no telling what my eyes or ears witnessed that caused me to stop immediately and affirm my gratitude and contentment with my life. And, the other day when I read it, I thought, “Thank God for what I don’t have, too.” Do you ever think about all of the things that you don’t have? I am not speaking of the wants and desires that you wish you had; I am talking about all of the things that you don’t want and you don’t have. Or, how about all of the things that you should have, but you don’t have? We may never know the depths or breadth or lengths of God’s love and mercy. But, as we look around the world at the tragedies that are suffered, it ought to cause us to throw our hands up in praise if we are not afflicted with that type of calamity. When we look over our past mistakes, and we realize that we have escaped some of the worst possible scenarios for our lives with consequences that are not nearly as awful as they could be, we ought to fall to our knees and thank God for His mercy. These mirrors of mercy can appear on any level of our lives. On a spiritual level, children of God can be thankful that we do not have to go through someone else to get to God. We can come boldly before His throne of grace asking anything we need in Jesus’ name because Jesus took our place on the cross (Hebrews 4:16; John 14:13). We should be thankful that we do not have nail-scarred hands and feet or a pierced side, which is the least that we deserve for our sins. On an emotional level, we can praise Him when we do not have any more tears to cry over someone who has caused us pain, whether it is a spouse, a loved one, a family member, a co-worker, or a friend. It is such a blessing when we get to the day when we do not have any more emotion to give to that situation and we can finally move on with our lives. On a romantic level, thank God for that person that He did not allow you to be with or to stay with who would have done more damage to your life than good. On a physical level, we should appreciate that we do not have all of the ailments that we could have. Some sickness happens because we live in corruptible bodies. Some sickness happens because we have bad habits or do not properly value our health. In either case, even when we are infirmed with something, we can be grateful that we do not have other conditions and diseases in addition to that one. On a financial level, we ought to be grateful that we do not have to depend on man as our source. Once again, this is not an encouragement to quit your job, but just recognize that no matter what man does, if you belong to God, He has your back--and front and sides. (2 Thessalonians 3:10; Psalm 27:1). Just think about all the debt you could have that you do not have. Whether you are in good standing because you used Godly wisdom in economic evaluations or because God has spared you from the most severe outcomes associated with your financial foolishness, you should shout, “Hallelujah”(especially in this economy). I believe that there are many times when we are trying our best to be content with what we do have that we can identify the gifts of grace, but we also should be thanking God for His mercy; for the circumstances with which we do not have to grapple. What makes it difficult to recognize these blessings is that we truly do not know all of the situations from which God has protected us, which is a blessing in and of itself. Nevertheless, the next time you find yourself feeling pitiful because of what you do not have, turn the pity party inpraise party for what you do not have by the mercy of God. Remember, (and I cannot think of the exact quote or who said it) it is better to be able to desire what you do not have than to have what you do not desire. Ms. EV I have a serious problem. I have been suffering with it for about eighteen years. I should probably consult my doctor and have her order some x-rays because I am sure that my right foot is made of lead. Or, at least that is what I am told. (If you don’t get the joke, keep reading, let it marinate, and it will come to you). For as long as I can remember, I have been driving, “with the flow of traffic.” I have even picked on my dad because he so vigilantly obeys the rules of the road. In fairness, I have only ever driven a Corolla and a Sentra. If you have ever driven those cars, then you know that you only know you are speeding if you are looking at the speedometer because the ride is so smooth.
In college, my friends and I went on a trip and in our haste to get there, the driver (not me) sped through a construction zone and we got pulled over. I felt horrible because the ticket was going to be very expensive. So, I put on the performance of my life with tears, fake illness, the works, and we got out with a warning. After college, I got four speeding tickets over about a yearlong time period. I tried the tears on three of the four occasions, but it didn’t work. I had to go to driver’s school to get the points off of my license. Then, on my bar application, I had to put the details of my traffic violations, and once that was submitted, if I got another ticket, I would have to pay to amend the application. So, I changed my ways. I kept speeding, but I was much more observant about where the police officers were hiding. And, that worked until a few nights ago. I was on my way home from a hallelujah good time at an open mic night, and I drove past a police officer with someone pulled over and continued on my way home, as always, driving with the flow of traffic. Then, I saw a car pull up fairly close behind me and the lights came on with just enough siren to get my attention. I thought, “Surely he is not pulling me over for speeding. Maybe my taillight was not properly fixed or something.” My heart started racing and my palms started sweating. I rolled down the window to find a very stern looking police officer, who probably thought I was much younger than I am because my eyes started tearing as soon as he began to explain to me why he pulled me over, which was speeding and not giving enough space for the officer on the side of the road. He took my license and I started praying because I truly did not know the rule that I broke and I had not paid attention to my speed, so I was not speeding purposely. I got a very firm talking to and a warning, praise God, because who wants a $300-$400 ticket. I was still shaking the entire 2 blocks to my house (yes, I was that close to home). I thought, “Lord, I am thankful that you softened this officer’s heart.” Then, I began to wonder why he let me off with a warning. Maybe it was because he saw my God Belongs In My City t-shirt. Maybe it was the tears. Then, the fleshly side of me voiced the opinion that he didn’t have any proof of exactly how fast I was going because he hadn’t actually clocked me. Nevertheless, when it comes down to it, I didn’t approach the situation with the attitude that he needed to show my evidence of my wrongdoing. Instead, I had a sincerely contrite heart and the officer, and God, showed me mercy. So, what is the point of all of this? This incident taught me a lesson about my attitude towards rules. In this world, we have laws and rules, but more important than that, God gives His children boundaries. Our attitude towards those boundaries can determine how prosperous our lives are. (By the way, if we follow all of God’s commands, there will be no problem keeping man’s laws). Our attitude about rules stems from how we look at rules. I will take the traffic laws, for example, I usually see the speed limit as a flexible guideline. Sure, it says limit, but as long as you are driving safely and not harming anyone else, what is the big deal with breaking the rules. This is the same attitude with which people approach premarital sex, overindulgence in food and drink and many other sins. When God tells us not to engage in these activities, it is for our spiritual, emotional, mental and physical well-being. He is not calling us to adapt His commands to our own lifestyle. Sometimes, I look at the rules of the road as frustrating annoyances. I do not just get in my car to drive around. I have places to go and people to see and anything that slows my pace is annoying. Does this sound familiar at all? Why do I have to yield to other drivers? Or slow down at a yellow light? Or drive ten miles an hour so that other people can rubberneck at an accident? Many times I just wish I had a teleporter to get me from one place to another. At times, we view God’s boundaries as frustrating annoyances, too. It is as if we think God is holding out on us. And that is literally the oldest trick in the book. It is the same philosophy that the serpent used to deceive Eve in the garden. God is not going to keep anything good from us. He already has given and still continues to give us more than we deserve. All He asks for is that we show our love through obedience. God’s boundaries are not flexible guidelines or frustrating annoyances, they are fervent protection. As my uncle, Rev. Paige, said yesterday in his sermon, “God loves us too much to allow us to sin successfully.” If our attitude about rules becomes one of gratitude for protection from dangers seen and unseen, then we will gain a whole new perspective on how much God loves us. I work with children, they beg for boundaries, not literally, of course, but it is very obvious that they thrive on knowing that I will give them guidelines to lead them in the right direction. We need boundaries to show us the right direction for our best lives. And the sooner, we embrace an attitude of thankfulness that God cares enough to lead us in the right direction, the sooner we will fully enjoy our life’s journey. Ms. EV There is an old song that teaches to accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative. At a certain point in my life, I had become so adept that that skill that I only saw my positive characteristics as reality. In a parable, Jesus talked about a Pharisee that did the same thing. He said, “I follow rules…I pay tithes…I am a good person…I…I…I….” We may think the Pharisee was being ridiculous, but we do the same thing. We pick out everything that we are doing right, no matter what we are doing wrong, and believe that God should be satisfied with our good works and ignore our lapses of faith. We measure ourselves against others, of whom we are quick to see the faults and flaws. We figure, as long as we are not like these “bad people” and our good deeds outweigh the bad, then we are fine. God should be pleased with us and not hold our “little” day-to-day sins against (and that’s if we even recognize that we are sinning).
We need to be more like the publican in the story. This dude was a sinner and he knew it. He was not proud of it. He was humbled by the situation and he feared God. My dad always says, “Every time you purposely disobey God, you are saying to Him, ‘I don’t believe You are real.’” If we truly reverence God, we will acknowledge, rather than ignore sins. The publican knew that it was only by God’s grace and mercy that he was able to live. The Pharisee’s “prayer,” or rather listing of qualifications for a blessing, fell on deaf ears, but the publican’s prayer was heard. God sees and knows all. He does not need to be reminded of how good we think we are. He appreciates it when we live in reality, admit our shortcomings, and know that we are not perfect and that we need His love, His grace and His mercy. If you feel the need to accentuate the positive, tell someone in your life all of the things that you love about him or her, but don’t puff yourself up before God. Ms. EV Back in the day, before it skipped five years and got weird, I watched the show Desperate Housewives. It followed the paths of four friends who lived on the same street and were all experiencing varying degrees of marital dysfunction. It, and many other shows like it, portrays issues that might cause one to consider never getting married; they make the institutions of marriage and family seem like some cruel joke. I know that each family faces its own set of difficulties, but it does not stop me from wanting a family of my own.
This morning on the radio, the topic of the day was, “When I graduated from high school, I thought I would be a _____________, but I ended up being a ___________.” So, of course, I talked back to the radio. When I graduated from high school I thought I would be a high-powered attorney, wife and mother to three or four children, but I ended up being a divorced high school teacher with a very spoiled cat. The good news is that I have recently discovered that, despite my life not being how I envisioned that it would be, I am no longer desperately seeking the things that are out of my control. There was a time when I wanted a husband and children so badly that I married the wrong person because I feared he would be the last one to ever ask. There was a time when I was willing to compromise my morals and do what I knew was wrong in the sight of God just to feel loved because I felt I had to give in to temptation to keep a man in my life. There was a time when I was willing to look past what I desire in a mate for the sake of going on a date because I did not know if I would ever date again. But now, I am so filled with Love from the inside that the desperation has dissipated. I am willing to wait for the person that I have asked God to provide for me. I am willing to live alone, sleep alone, and eat alone because I know that God has me right where I need to be. I also know from reading the Bible that God never refused to provide, for people who followed His Word, after a famine was over. Does it hurt some nights? Absolutely; it hurts some days, too, but I know my role in how I got where I am, so I know it could be much worse and I praise God for His mercy. Desperation can lead to life-changing decisions, and not in a good way. It can lead to infidelity, violence, promiscuity. It can lead to behaviors that have hazardous results. Desperate is not cute on a woman (or a man). The only thing any of us should be desperate for is more of God; more time in His presence and more intimacy with Him. Ms. EV My niece wants to be a teacher like her mother and I. The difference is that she knows she would like to be a teacher now. Her mother and I both had other careers, aspirations, and experiences prior to teaching. I think both us still have dreams that go beyond teaching. But, my niece is pretty determined that this is what she wants to do, so today, she shadowed me. She watched me in my class. Now, I am very, very frank and candid with my older nephews and niece, I keep it real, so I did not sugarcoat anything that I did in class today. There was no show; it was all real.
I needed to confront my students on some behaviors that were displeasing to me. Normally, this would not occur in front of an audience, but it had to be done now because it is the middle of the last quarter and there is only a short amount of time to correct bad behavior. So, after my correcting yesterday, I knew that I had to approach the issue with sensitivity and grace. You know the saying, “You can attract more flies with honey than with vinegar?” Well, I really don’t know why anyone wants to catch flies, but that’s not the point. The point is that in this particular moment, the attention of my students was the fly. I could have laid into them; I had plenty of ammunition. Instead, I took a soft, but stern approach. And, although, they didn’t say much to me, word travelled back around that my approach was appreciated. Time will tell if my audience was indeed moved to action, but when I asked my niece what she learned. She replied, “That your kids need to do their work,” Then, I asked her for her honest opinion on how I handled the situation and she said I handled it well. That meant more to me than any reaction from my students. As a Christian, it is not always easy to find the balance between nice and mean. I think I’ve written about it several times in the last couple of weeks because it is an area I am working on personally. My desire is for others to see Christ in me, but that does not mean that I am to be disrespected because I show grace and mercy. This entire situation was a great lesson in how we treat God. He gives us opportunity after opportunity to follow His Will, and yet, many times, we disrespect Him and take His kindness for granted. So, I understand why, in the Old Testament, God took people out in those situations because initially that’s how I felt. But, I am so glad that He sent Jesus and sees us through Jesus’ eyes, with grace and mercy. I hope I get the results I desire, but I will not be a salty light or spread venomous vinegar around to get my “flies.” I will listen to the Holy Spirit’s guidance, and behave accordingly. Ms. EV So this morning, I was accused (in a backhanded way) of being too nice, which is funny because usually people are telling me I am too hard on others. But apparently, it's not fair to those want want to be mean just for the heck of it when other people are nice because it makes them look bad. In any case, the whole situation boiled down to grace and mercy. Just how many chances should we give people? When are they going to learn their lesson and do what's right?
Then, I read one devotional that spoke about Hosea and Gomer. It spoke of how Hosea had to forgive his wife, the prostitute who had been unfaithful to him and even buy her back. Talk about grace and mercy. That piece of history in the Bible illustrates God's love for the Israelites and foreshadows Jesus' sacrifice for us. Then, my verse of the day was Matthew 7:12 [The Golden Rule] "Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets." Two unrelated Biblical truths that gave answers to my questions. And, as if, God didn't drive home the point already, He showed me another illustration of how grace and mercy works in my own life. There are five children on this earth that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt would do anything for because I love them unconditionally. I want the best for them. I know I cannot make decisions for them, but I try to be sure that they know all of their options, so they can make good choices. They don't always choose the best, and most certainly don't always pick what I would have chosen; nevertheless, my love for them never decreases and if I have to, I will help them pick up the pieces and start over or move on. This is and everyday example in my life of the type of love God has for us. I praise Him that His love is unconditional. He gives us free will and the opportunity to make sound decisions and He wants the best for us. When we make mistakes, He is loving enough to let us fall, so that we can learn, and then pick us up and help us keep moving. Grace and mercy. It doesn't mean that you're a doormat for Jesus being taken advantage of by hapless ne'er-do-wells. Sometimes you have to let people fall, but then, don't stand there and laugh, when they reach for your hand, help them get up and keep moving. Grace and mercy. His never ends. Should ours? |
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