For those who are not in the education profession, the amount of vacation time educators are afforded is incomprehensible. However, for those of us in the classrooms 180 days a year, we know that the breaks are a necessity for the sake of students and our sanity. Many people do different things with the eight weeks or so of summer break. For my first six summers, I always had something work or work-adjacent to do, like summer job, cheer camp, summer teaching training. As this summer approached though, I realized that I had nothing to do.
I had already participated in One Spark and gone to Nashville. I have spent wisely enough during the school year to not need to get an extra job to fill in the gap this summer. The program that I worked the last two years was canceled due to budget cuts. I had eight weeks with absolutely nothing to do. Well, I take that back, the first week was a family vacation/trip to take my oldest nephew to college, but other than that, I was staring down the barrel of weeks and weeks with no planned agenda. The main thing the summer gives me is the opportunity to sleep in later in the morning than I can during the school year. And, the extra few hours of morning sleep was really the only thing about which I was excited. Spending seven or more weeks at home, with just my cat, my television, my guitar and my thoughts to keep me company was a really scary proposition. Furthermore, I just found it to be outright lazy to sit around all summer and not do anything. I have come a long way from the young woman who could not be alone. Still, I have managed to be sure that my life is filled with activity and people I love, so that the times when I feel lonely are few and far between. So, I challenged myself to do little to nothing this summer. I challenged myself to relax, get rest, be free and, well, be lazy. Not lazy in the sense of slothfulness, but lazy in the sense of not tying myself to a bunch of commitments just for the sake of having something to do. For the first couple of weeks, I started to sense that I would become one with my couch and be imprisoned by my thoughts (a very scary place to be at times). Then, I started dedicating more time to stillness and quietness. I started communing more with God instead of running to everyone else in my life with my every thought or idea. And, slowly, but surely, I started to feel comfortable with me. I am not a hermit (though, I thought that might be where this was going). I do leave the house. I go to church. I hang out with my family. Nonetheless, a beautiful thing has happened. I became okay with just God and me. I did not feel as alone as I once feared I would in quietness and solitude. It is still a work in progress, but no longer do I feel obligated to stay busy to avoid the fact that I do not have the life I envisioned. Instead, I can rest in my Father and allow Him to show me His vision for my life. Make no mistake, there are some rough days, but I have survived being by myself with nothing to do. I have more than survived; I have thrived. I have learned to enjoy this place of solace. Now, it might make it hard to go back to work in a few weeks, or maybe, I just will not feel so pressured to stay busy for the sake of being busy. Time will tell, but for now, I am enjoying the time that God has given me. Ms. EV
0 Comments
I am a professional sleeper. I have been taking naps pretty consistently since high school and anyone who knows me knows that a nap is a part of my daily routine. As a matter of fact, earlier today, a colleague told me that my former students asked him to post notes online and he was unsure of how to do it. They replied, “Ms. [EV] knows how to do it!” To which, he responded, “That’s because she takes naps!” I am not really sure what my napping habit has to do with my computer talents, but it shows that even my colleagues know that I am no stranger to dozing off each afternoon.
I enjoy naps because I find them to be refreshing. On a workday, I get up very early, so by the middle of the day, I am very tired. My family and closest friends know that, generally, I cannot be reached between 4PM and 6PM. I put my phone on silent, put my sleep mask on to block out the light, get cozy on the couch or in my bed, and I zone out. Sometimes I fall completely asleep and other times I just lay there and recharge. But, once I wake up, I can think more clearly again, I am in a good mood, and I can accomplish whatever other tasks lie ahead. On days when I do not get a nap, I am either cranky or deliriously silly, so let’s just say I am not at my best. As much as I appreciate naps, I have an even greater appreciation for the fact that I serve a God who never dozes off. Psalm 121 says that God never sleeps or slumbers. He doesn’t even “get in a couple of winks” here and there. He is constantly and consistently holding the world in the palm of His hands. I am so grateful that He does not feel the need to shut me out everyday for a couple of hours, so that He can recharge. Instead, He is there for me every, single time I need Him. Just pause for a moment and think of how awesome that is! I love my family and my friends, but there are some times, no matter how much they love me, that they just cannot be there for me. I am sure that others have experienced this. Maybe, late at night, you feel a sudden attack of sadness. Or, perhaps, early in the morning, you start having a bout with anxiety. Sometimes we cannot call others because it is too late or too early. Sometimes, we cannot call others because they just will not understand the issue. In those times, and at all times, it is a blessing to know that we can call on the name of Jesus. These moments are the moments when I realize that God should be my first resort and not my last resort. I realize that I need to depend on Him and trust in Him because, though He can use others as a resource in my life, He is the Source of my life. So, I am glad that He does not sleep, nor does He slumber. I am ecstatic that He is not just an on-time God, but an all-the-time God. Because He never dozes off, I can rest in peace on this side of Heaven. Resting in the midst of tests, trials and storms is a form of worship. It shows God that you truly believe He can handle every situation that is presented in this life. So, go ahead and take a nap, or, if you are not a nap person, at least get a full night of sleep; God is awake, alert, and able to take care of you. Ms. EV A couple of weeks ago, I was preparing to do the Ms. EV's Relationship Advice broadcast, when I realized that I was just spent. I was tired physically, emotionally, spiritually just tired. So, I decided to take a little break. And, it was not an easy decision. However, I realized that it was better to take a break, get a chance to rest and rejuvenate after a huge event for which I am responsible, and then, come back stronger and better.
The two weeks away was anything, but relaxing. I knew that if I did not step back for a moment from a few things, then everything I had going on would be at stake. I love writing; it is an emotional and spiritual outlet and I love sharing the wisdom that God has given me over the years. I did not want to risk writing mediocre content or missing out on a message that was supposed to be written because of my busyness. It wasn't what I wanted to do, but it was what i had to do. Sometimes, we get so busy that we do not give our best. Even after I decided to take a little hiatus, I realized that I still was not giving my best to God. I was so busy doing "good" things that I was not spending quality time with God. Even if it meant giving up things that I liked, I could not abandon my first love. I had to purposefully make time to pray and not rush through my alone time with God regardless of other demands on my time. I had to get creative, and sometimes I faltered, but God is faithful and He picked me back up and what is even better, He did not beat me up about it (I was doing a perfectly good job of that myself); instead, God encouraged me to take the rest I needed and to find that rest in Him. So, now I am back. I have some VERY exciting adventures on the horizon and I an expectantly waiting to continue to see God's wonders working in and through my life. If you need a break, take it. God wants us at our best; that is why He encourages rest. Ms. EV I am a professional sleeper. I have been taking naps pretty consistently since high school and anyone who knows me knows that a nap is a part of my daily routine. As a matter of fact, earlier today, a colleague told me that my former students asked him to post notes online and he was unsure of how to do it. They replied, “Ms. [EV] knows how to do it!” To which, he responded, “That’s because she takes naps!” I am not really sure what my napping habit has to do with my computer talents, but it shows that even my colleagues know that I am no stranger to dozing off each afternoon.
I enjoy naps because I find them to be refreshing. On a workday, I get up very early, so by the middle of the day, I am very tired. My family and closest friends know that, generally, I cannot be reached between 4PM and 6PM. I put my phone on silent, put my sleep mask on to block out the light, get cozy on the couch or in my bed, and I zone out. Sometimes I fall completely asleep and other times I just lay there and recharge. But, once I wake up, I can think more clearly again, I am in a good mood, and I can accomplish whatever other tasks lie ahead. On days when I do not get a nap, I am either cranky or deliriously silly, so let’s just say I am not at my best. As much as I appreciate naps, I have an even greater appreciation for the fact that I serve a God who never dozes off. Psalm 121 says that God never sleeps or slumbers. He doesn’t even “get in a couple of winks” here and there. He is constantly and consistently holding the world in the palm of His hands. I am so grateful that He does not feel the need to shut me out everyday for a couple of hours, so that He can recharge. Instead, He is there for me every, single time I need Him. Just pause for a moment and think of how awesome that is! I love my family and my friends, but there are some times, no matter how much they love me, that they just cannot be there for me. I am sure that others have experienced this. Maybe, late at night, you feel a sudden attack of sadness. Or, perhaps, early in the morning, you start having a bout with anxiety. Sometimes we cannot call others because it is too late or too early. Sometimes, we cannot call others because they just will not understand the issue. In those times, and at all times, it is a blessing to know that we can call on the name of Jesus. These moments are the moments when I realize that God should be my first resort and not my last resort. I realize that I need to depend on Him and trust in Him because, though He can use others as a resource in my life, He is the Source of my life. So, I am glad that He does not sleep, nor does He slumber. I am ecstatic that He is not just an on-time God, but an all-the-time God. Because He never dozes off, I can rest in peace on this side of Heaven. Resting in the midst of tests, trials and storms is a form of worship. It shows God that you truly believe He can handle every situation that is presented in this life. So, go ahead and take a nap, or, if you are not a nap person, at least get a full night of sleep; God is awake, alert, and able to take care of you. Ms. EV Today’s Vacation Bible School verse is, “Praise the name of God forever and ever, for He has all wisdom and power” (Daniel 2:20 NLT). The lesson for today is the account of Daniel being thrown into the lions’ den. If you are unfamiliar with the story, the text is in Daniel 6. So, as I listened to the song I will teach later and looked at the theme for the day, “Amazing! God’s Power Over Circumstances,” I thought, “Do I really believe that God has control over every circumstance?” Yesterday, I wrote about God having control over everything and nothing being too hard for Him; however, if we really believe this, then we should never lose any sleep over our problems.
Anyone who knows me knows that I love to sleep. And, I thought I was the sleep champion until I got my cat, Joy Bella. When I first brought her home, having never taken care of a pet on my own and knowing nothing about cats in particular, I was concerned that she seemed to sleep almost all day. At first, I thought maybe it was because she was a baby. Have you ever watched baby’s sleep? They are so peaceful; they do not have a care in the world. They sleep until they have had enough rest, not tossing or turning, not begging their mind to stop racing. Hence, the phrase, “sleep like a baby.” That is the kind of rest God wants us to find in Him. He wants us to be so assured that He has all wisdom and power, that when we are overcome by exhaustion, we can enjoy peaceful rest rather than become so tired that it is difficult for us to be used for His glory. After a few days, Joy’s sleeping habits continued to concern me, though so, I did some research on cats. I found out that they sleep for about three-quarters of the day, in little spurts (hence, the term “cat nap”) and mostly during the day. I observed Joy Bella, and found that she could fall asleep anywhere. Sure, she has her favorite chair and window perch, but if something or someone (me) is in her way, she simply finds another place to rest and peacefully goes to sleep. The television can be on, music can be blasting, I can be on the phone; it does not matter. When Joy wants rest; she gets it. And, I wish I could be more like that. I wish that I could find rest no matter where I am and no matter what circumstances are going on in my life. I am definitely better at this than I used to be. When I first got divorced, I had a lot of anxiety about being alone again, not to mention I was in law school, which brought on its own set of issues. One day, I realized that I had not slept for more than two hours each night. I went to bed, but I knew when each hour passed because I was looking at the clock. I spoke to a doctor who let me know that I was suffering from insomnia, which I later found out was a symptom of a larger issue; I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. The good news is that I got treatment, I recovered, and then I got rest. But, it was embarrassing for me, as a Christian, to have let fear and worry overcome me so much. It did not end there; I was better, but every once in a while, I find myself back in the grip of anxiety. And, my problems are nothing like what Daniel was facing. Daniel did nothing wrong. All he did was stand up for God and live in obedience to His command. As a result, Daniel was revered and prosperous, which caused him to have some haters. The haters set Daniel up and forced the king to have to throw him into the lions’ den. Now, I mentioned I have a cat, when she playfully scratches me or bites me, it hurts! So, imagine what actual lions could do. This was a serious circumstance! But, Daniel trusted that God knew what He was doing and rather than staying up all night fearing what the lion would do to him, Daniel fell asleep on lion pillows. Most of the time our problems do not involve possibly being torn limb from limb, but I know that when it is your circumstance, no matter how insignificant it seems to others, it is huge to you. Let me encourage you, there is no problem too large or too small for God. When you are facing an unfavorable situation, do what Daniel did. Turn your problems into pillows. Ask God to work it out. Trust that He will work it out. Then, get some rest. Rest is an act of worship. It is us showing God that come what may, we need not lose sleep because we know that He never sleeps or slumbers and that He has all wisdom and power. Grab hold of your lion pillows and get your cat nap on because God has it all under control. Ms. EV I love rain. Well, I love rain if I am inside of a building and I don’t have outside plans. A good steady rain is like the perfect sleep symphony. You hear the raindrops tapping against the windows in a perfect rhythm that could only be God’s design. The sky darkens to a grayish shade. I am hard-pressed to stay awake in an overcast setting with that melodic sound. While rain, in actuality, feels harmless, and maybe even relaxing, again when you are inside, a storm brings up a whole other set of feelings. When you add thunder and lightning, tornado warnings, and power outages to the rain, it is not so great anymore.
When I looked at the weather this morning, it described Tropical Storm Debby as a stalled storm. The meteorologists are not sure how long this storm will hover over our area. All they know is that it is unpredictable and slow-moving. When I read that, I thought, “That sounds like some of the storms in my life: unpredictable and slow-moving.” When the rain first started yesterday, we were inside, so it was the perfect soundtrack to a nap. Before most storms, it seems like everything is alright. During the periods in our lives where the rain is still peaceful, we should take the opportunities that God gives us to rest. I am not saying sleep all day; however tempting that might be, but rest in Him. We should read His Word, listen to His voice and meditate on what God has for us, so that when the storm comes, and it will come, we are prepared for it. Being well-rested is key to surviving a storm because you never know how long it will take to ride through the storm. After the peaceful rain came the lightning and thunder. Have you ever watched lightning? I think lightning is beautiful…from faraway of course. It just seems to form these cracks in the sky and then there is a bright light through the darkness that exposes everything around for a brief second. In our spiritual storms, when the lightning comes, we start to crack open and be exposed. Those insecurities and indiscretions in our lives are exposed, even if only for a brief moment. There is enough of this amazing light to show the parts of us that we did not even realize were hidden. The lightning reveals enough to trigger the thunder. Sometimes it sounds like loud shouting and sometimes like quiet rumblings. In either case, it is like all of the voices that vie for our attention. Some are louder than others. Can we drown out the negative long enough to hear the positive? Can we silence the know-it-alls long enough to listen to the One who knows it all? Following the lightning and thunder, we were subject to a tornado warning. If only we would heed the tornado warnings in our spiritual storms. You know, that feeling in the pit of your belly that tells you that everything is about to spin completely out of control. There are actions we can take during the warning to protect ourselves from the harmful effects of a tornado, but once we get caught up in a whirlwind of disobedience or deception or despicable behavior, it is too late to minimize the damage and destruction. Usually in these storms, where it is heavy rain, tornado or hurricane, there is a power outage. I cannot stand a power outage. It is during those times that you realize just how much you rely on being plugged into a power source. Sure many items can run on batteries, but if the battery runs out before the power comes back on, those items are useless. The same thing happens in a spiritual storm. Perhaps, we feel plugged in to God’s power until we are tossed around a bit. Then, like Job, we are wondering where God has gone. He has not gone anywhere, and the good news is that we can plug into Him anytime we want to, even in the midst of a storm. He is waiting for us to reach out to Him. We know that in life there will be storms. There will be tests and trials that come to make us stronger and more prepared to face the next challenge. Nonetheless, the storms in our lives maybe unpredictable and slow-moving like this tropical storm we are experiencing right now. Coach and I broke up almost four years ago. At the time, I thought we would get back together when we had a chance to calm down. We did not, and I have not been on a date since our last date (some of which has to do with my elevated values, but I do not get asked a lot). Four years ago, I did not think that I would still be very single and not even close to having a family of my own. Four years ago, if I had known where I would be right now, I probably would have broken down even more than I did. So, thank God, I did not know because that version of me would not have been able to handle the news that I would not be married and have a baby by 35. However, over four years, my relationship with Christ, through this stalled storm, has grown closer than ever. I have come to understand that God truly knows what is best for me and He will keep me in the midst of the storm. Though it may not feel like it, all storms can bring a blessing, even when they are stalled storms. Just hold on to faith, rest in God, explore what He exposes, listen to His voice, heed His warnings, and plug in to His power. Your stalled storm has nothing on your Savior. Ms. EV In my younger years, boredom was something that rarely existed. This was, of course, back in the day, when children actually played outside with friends. Then, as an adolescent, I found sports and other activities that kept me busy after school. I would get home just in time for dinner, homework and family time. As a college student and law student, I prided myself on being a part of several extracurricular activities and working while maintaining my grades. But, once the school years were over, and the “real world” experience began, I found myself getting bored and I hated it.
Boredom, for me, during those times meant that I was alone with my thoughts. Being an introverted, analytical person, boredom created an opportunity for me to examine every detail of my life, which generally left me disappointed because I was not where I thought I would be. As I have grown closer to Christ, I have learned how to reflect on my present and my past with thankfulness. I have also learned to appreciate boredom. For me, being bored is the opposite of busy. I love busy. Busy means I don’t have time to think about being single or not having the level of success that I desire. Busy is not threatening. It usually brings accolades and attention. It’s my Martha place. But, literally, as I sit here, having finished a huge event, caught up on my work, and feeling pretty satisfied, I have to say that I am thankful for the boredom. I am thankful for the break and the rest. I’m finally getting comfortable in my Mary place; a place of reflection where I can sit at the feet of Jesus. I can listen for the still, small voice because it doesn’t have to compete with all of the other voices (real voices not just the one in my head). I can get strength for the journey and reenergize for my next assignment. In the past, I would spend this time agonizing over exactly what that assignment would be. I would fill the time with searching out clues for how I could get busy again. Now, I have learned that there is a season for busy and season for boredom. Both are a blessing from God. Ms. EV |
About Ms. EVWhen you have elevated values, it is not about being snobby; it is about living victoriously! Archives
March 2016
Categories
All
Copyright Notice© Toni L. Wortherly and Ms. EV's Blog, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Toni Wortherly and Ms. EV's Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
![]() Ms. EV's Blog by Toni L. Wortherly is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License. |