A roadblock is barrier or barricade on a road, especially one set up by the authorities. They can be intentionally placed because of construction or an accident, or they can be the result of something outside of anyone’s control like a fallen tree or a sink hole. In either case, when you meet a roadblock, you have to decide what to do. There are usually two options we are left pondering while we sit in traffic headed toward the impending obstruction of our route. Turn back around and wait for a better time to complete your mission or take a detour and complete the mission (just not in the way we had envisioned).

When you are actually driving, the choice may be clearer, depending on purpose of your trip in the first place. However, in the figurative sense, when you are faced with a roadblock on the path to your goals, the choice between turning around and taking a detour is a very serious choice. If you turn around, does it show a lack of faith or does it show that you are being cautious about where you are headed and when you might get there? If you choose a detour, does it signify perseverance, a win-at-all-costs attitude and determination or does it signify a lack of faith when you decide to call an audible (sorry, I miss football) and take another route so you can get to where you think you deserve to be.

This is not something that we can take lightly. I am known to analyze and overanalyze every decision I make. I plan my spontaneity. It does not even matter what type of decision it is: relationships, financial, career, ministry; if I hit a roadblock, I am taking whatever amount of time it takes to decide the next course of action. Even if it means sitting in proverbial traffic with people honking at me about what I should be doing, I will pray and consider my options carefully. It is not out of a lack of faith; it is because I want to be sure of whether God is saying no, go, or take it slow.

Sometimes, we think God is taking us in one direction, but He has another plan. Sometimes He needs to get our attention because we have taken His plan and put our own spin on it. Whatever the case, the roadblock is there for a reason. Maybe God wants to know how deeply you want to reach this goal. Maybe you’ve been barreling full steam ahead and have not stopped to assess whether or not you are still on God’s path for you. Maybe God wants to know how deeply you want Him. The only way to know the reason is to go to God and ask Him what He would have you do. Notice I said ask God, not your parents or your pastor or your friends. If God wants you to hear from those people, He will make it so, but depend on Him to answer the question. At times, that answer will come instantly and clearly; other times, you will have to wait. But, whatever the answer and whenever it comes, and whoever delivers the message, it will be what is best for you. A roadblock is not the opportunity for you to quit; it is the chance for you to quiet your mind and seek God’s direction. Ms. EV

Nine years ago today, it was the day after my law school graduation. I was preparing to fly to Washington, D.C. for my best friend’s graduation from her master’s program at Howard University. Then, when I returned, I would begin bar prep classes. Today, I am sitting in my old high school as a social studies teacher. My best friend lives in D.C., but is a completely different person. In nearly ten years, my life looks dramatically different from what I envisioned. While I truly value the friendships that I have developed in the period of time, I also have a sense of loss for the friendship that I chose to let go. And, though I do find my career rewarding, it is also very taxing at times. I was asked by a colleague just the other day, “Do you ever think about going back to law?” So, as I reflect on where I was and who I was nine years ago today, a young girl excited about the possibilities for my life, hopeful that I would find my path, confident in my friendships, I cannot help but wonder if I make the right turn?

I wanted to be a lawyer because Claire Huxtable was a lawyer. Claire was married to a doctor, raised five children, and was well respected. I was eight years old when I made the declaration, and aside from one year of deviation when I wanted to be a fashion designer at age nine (and who didn’t), I stuck to my goal. I didn’t really get that it was television and the real world would be different.  I knew I did not want anything to do with criminal law. I made the law my life in high school and college. I think the law is what attracted me to my ex-husband. He had some situations in his life that allowed me to flex my legal muscles. But, when that relationship ended, my life went into a tailspin. I fell out of love with the idea of practicing law. And now, looking back, I don’t know if it was because at the time, I didn’t feel capable of making rational decisions about my life. I am just wondering if my confidence was shaken so bad by one situation that I threw away a lifelong dream. I practiced law for three years, but it brought me little joy and loads of anxiety. The initial draw to teaching was the interaction with the kids and the fact that I had not worked year-round for so many years that I thought I would be unable to adjust. Even on the days when I am frustrated with my job, there is usually at least one present or former student who reminds me of why I do what I do. I am just not sure if I gave practicing law a fair opportunity to provide me with the same experience. For the years that I practiced, I always knew that my law practice would come to an end. I did my best for each and every client, but never gave that career path a chance. Did I make the right turn?

In college, I made two very close friends. We talked about being in each other’s weddings, being godmothers to each other’s children. In fact, one was my maid of honor. At the time, I could not imagine the rest of my life without these two people. As I began to grow in Christ, our lives took different directions. I was so terrified of moving backwards that I made myself distant and eventually, lost touch with these two young women. I have since reached out to them, but I feel that the damage done by my attitude is irreparable. The saddest part of the situation is that I have no children of my own, but I know there are at least four children who were meant to be my godchildren and I am not a part of their lives at all. I can pray for them from afar, which is the best I can do for them, but it could have been so much more. I have great friends now, who I am spiritually in sync with and I would not trade for the world. Yet, I still wonder…did I make the right turn?

I am not sure if I will get the answer to that question on this side of Heaven. And, I am not complaining about my life because I love my life, my career and the people in my life. In pondering whether or not I made good decisions right now, I am not engaged in an exercise of ‘coulda shoulda woulda,” but I am thanking God that for every turn I made, He worked it out for my good. I am discovering some areas in which I may not have forgiven myself. I can use these past experiences to create less questions in my future when I have a choice to make. I could play the “What If” game incessantly, but that is an exercise in futility because the past already happened and it cannot be changed. I also do not want to project into the future because I think that an irrational vision of the future led to some of my worst decisions. So, I think I will just enjoy WHAT IS knowing that God is in full control and I have every reason to be content and filled with joy simply because He has redeemed me, not to mention all of the other blessings He has bestowed upon me. Did I make the right turn? You can say “yes” with confidence to if your turn turns you towards Christ! Ms. EV