“Cultivate your own relationship with God, but don’t impose it on others. You’re fortunate if your behavior and your belief are coherent. But if you’re not sure, if you notice that you are acting in ways inconsistent with what you believe—some days trying to impose your opinions on others, other days just trying to please them—then you know that you’re out of line. If the way you live isn’t consistent with what you believe, then it’s wrong.” Romans 14:22-23 (MSG)
For the last couple of weeks, I have been trying to find a day where I could just take a break and have some “me time.” Now, that might sound strange for someone who spends sixteen to seventeen hours everyday weekday by herself. One would think I have plenty of “me time.” In reality, even though I am physically by myself for two-thirds of the day on most days except Sundays, if I spend any amount of time at work or tending to a church activity, the people and projects that I deal with in that time span get a lot of my attention even when they are not around. So, I decided a couple of weeks ago, that I needed a day for myself because I was starting to feel worn down and just out of touch. Today is that day. My not going to work today would not hinder my students’ progress or my interns progress; it would be a day that a capable substitute could handle, so I took a mental health day. I’m not sure what I am going to do with the rest of my day, but it was clear that as much as I sleep, I am not getting enough rest because my body took three extra hours this morning, despite being interrupted by my cat and my nephew. I knew that if I went much longer without some time to myself that my mind, body and spirit might be impacted, so I am glad that wisdom prevailed and I decided to take a day before I was forced to take one due to some breakdown. There are a lot of other people who are busier than I am. In addition to work, they may go to school, have children to raise, work on a lot of social or church committees, work out, socialize with friends more. And, maybe they never need a day off and good for them. It took me a long time to figure out that I should not try to be like other people or expect them to be like me. The only perfect model for behavior is Jesus Christ. When I read Romans 14, it convicted me. This chapter spoke volumes to me about my relationship with others and my relationship with God. But, the verses from yesterday’s blog and the ones above really stood out to me. We need to “cultivate [or work on our] own relationship with God, but [not] impose it on others.” This does not mean that we ought not share God with others, but that we ought not expect others to have the same relationship with God that we do. Furthermore, we need to focus on our own relationship and be sure that we are not acting inconsistently because we are too focused on others. Like I said, the minute I am around people and projects, my focus shifts to them. I am so concerned with fixing them that I do not give enough attention to what should be fixed about me. What we all really need to do it to ask ourselves, “Is the way I am living consistent with what I believe?” If we believe the Bible, the living Word of God, our lives should line up with the Word. We should not be manipulating the Word to conform to our will, but living out lives to conform to God’s Will. If we discover that we are living a life that is inconsistent with what we believe, then it is wrong. It is very difficult to make that discovery, though, if we are constantly focused on imposing our beliefs on those who we feel are worse than we are. It is hard to make that discovery when we are in the middle of projects that are designed to impose our will on others. Take some “me time” or rather “me and God time.” We need to really look at your lives and ask if it is pleasing to God. And then, here’s the kicker, listen for His answer, not our own self-righteous answers. Sure, there are people who are living deplorable lives. Yes, we should share our faith. Nonetheless, our faith can and should be shown in our walk. We need to be sure that we are living consistently with what we believe before we impose our beliefs on others and cause confusion about the God we love and serve. Ms. EV
0 Comments
Forget about deciding what’s right for each other. Here’s what you need to be concerned about: that you don’t get in the way of someone else, making life more difficult than it already is. I’m convinced—Jesus convinced me!—that everything as it is in itself is holy. We, of course, by the way we treat it or talk about it, can contaminate it. Romans 14:13-14 (The Message)
Sometimes I hear people say that the Bible is outdated. I have even heard people claim that we need a new version of the Bible that takes into account all of the issues that are facing the world today. This would seem to suggest, however, that God was somehow unaware of what would be happening today when He inspired the writing of the Bible through those whom He chose to express His will through His written Word. I happen to believe that the Bible is living and complete. I also believe that God has been present since the beginning of time and is the author of time and that there is nothing happening today or that will happen in the future that will surprise Him. That being said, sometimes we, as Christians, make it very difficult here on earth for our brothers and sisters. Many of us, including your truly, take it upon ourselves to decide for others what is right and what is wrong. We take principles from the laws before Christ and try to force them on others forgetting that Christ overcame the law. Or, we try to fit people into the mold we envision for the Church, the Body of Christ, rather than allowing God to prune and mold His beloved. The problem is that by doing that, we may push someone away from Christ instead of helping him or her draw nearer to Him. I am not saying that we should tolerate acts that are in direct disobedience to the Word of God. But, we should not sweat the small stuff. I am grateful that there are different denominations and that the love of God can be translated into any language. This allows different people to experience God in the way that best fits their personalities. It is not our job to judge the time that people go to church, or how many times, or for how long. Who are we to say what and when a person should fast? We should not argue over how a song is sung or how a sermon is preached. And, does it really matter if we wear three-piece suits or flip-flops to church? Some Christians spend too much time trying to do God’s work for Him, and in the process of trying to help God, you may just end up hurting the Kingdom. Romans 14 says that we do not need to sweat the small stuff because everything is holy until we, by the way we treat or talk about it, contaminate it. In the New Testament, God showed Peter that it was okay to eat any food that He created, so why do we judge people about what they eat or when. If they are thanking God for the provision of that food, it is holy. Why look cross-eyed at a young person with a tattoo? Especially, if the tattoo is uplifting God, i.e. Scripture, or if it reflects some blessing that God has given them and reminds them to place their lives in His hands. Once again, I am not suggesting that we ignore acts that are blatantly disrespectful and contradictory to God’s Word because His commands are appropriate for the times we live in and the times to come. Nonetheless, even in defending God’s Word and His principle, we must keep the command to love at the forefront of our minds. We must seek God’s wisdom and discernment in what to say and when. I would imagine that each of us, if we thought hard enough, can think of a time that someone in the church made us feel uncomfortable about who we are or how we act. It may have been a comment or even a harsh look and had we not been strong in the Lord, we may have walked away from the Christian life altogether. Think about how it made you feel. Why would you want anyone else to feel that way? Don’t sweat the small stuff with fellow Christians. If they love Christ, respect that and love them as you love yourself. Let’s deal with our own issues rather than projecting them on to others. And, let God be God. Ms. EV Today's blog is in response to a challenge from a Girlfriends in God devotional:
Dear God: I want to take the time to tell You how much I love You. First, I love You for your sacrifice. There is no pain worse than when a child dies; yet, You loved us all so much that You willingly gave Your Son to pay the debts that we can never repay. I love that You are a forgiving God. We continually choose paths that are contrary to Your Will; nonetheless, when we come to You acknowledging the errors of our ways and willing to turn our lives around, You forget the past and move us forward. I also love You for Your grace. There is no telling where I would be without Your grace. And, I understand that grace is not a license to sin; it is the gift of Your riches and blessings that I do not deserve. Furthermore, I love that You are a merciful God. There are countless actions that I have undertaken that I know should have had more dire consequences, but You spared me. There were still consequences for my actions; however, I know that it could have been much worse were it not for Your mercy. God, I want to thank You for my family. I get to experience different family dynamics all of the time, so I know how blessed I am. Thank You for saved parents who helped me to know You. Thank You for a close-knit, supportive family that is not perfect and has its differences, but when push comes to shove, we are there for each other. Moreover, I thank You for my health. I have not always had a perfectly clean bill of health; nevertheless, there has not been one ailment that has been debilitating. I still have the use of all of my senses, my limbs, and my brain, and I think sometimes we take being able to breathe for granted, so I thank You for each breath. I also want to thank You for the gifts that You have given me. I have not always used them in the way that I know You intended for them to be used, yet, You did not take them from me. Instead, You gave me the opportunity to discover how I could use them for You. Lord, I thank You for being God. I have tried to be in control of everything and it is not easy, so I am glad that I do not have to be. I am so grateful to be awakened each morning by the sun that You created peeking over the horizon. I am thankful that You will never leave me or forsake me. Even though, I battled with a fear of loneliness, You and I came out victorious. Thank You for delivering me from the dark corners of anxiety in my mind, from self-doubt, and from low self-esteem. Lord, I thank You for eternity and for a heavenly home. I thank You because I know that no matter what happens in my life and on this earth, this is not my home and physical death is not the end. Father, You are awesome and amazing and I do not deserve Your love, but I am so glad that You give it freely. Thank You. Ms. EV Yesterday, I talked about Job and the challenges he faced in being tested by God. One thing about Job that I liked was that he was a real human, and even though he endured and did not give up his faith, he did ask questions. God’s response was that He created all and knows all, but I do not believe that He responded in anger; He just wanted to be sure that Job knew that God does everything on purpose. I know why God does not reveal everything about His plan for our lives to us, but that does not make it any less frustrating at times. In faith, I still depend on Him, but in the flesh, I am discouraged when circumstances don’t go the way I feel they should be or don’t happen when I think they should. And then…
Then, there are the times when God speaks so clearly to my heart that all I can do is sigh a deeply heartfelt, “Thank You.” As you may have figured out, I am bothered at times by the fact that I am 34 and I do not have a husband (or a boyfriend for that matter) or any children of my own. Like the judgment of Job’s friends, I have experienced people looking at me with the side-eye, likely wondering what I did or what is wrong with me that I am now a “consecrated spinster.” Surely, I must have made some mistake or I must have made God mad at me. I know enough to know that is not the case, and so did Job. I watched a show last night that showed me that having a family might make my aspirations in life difficult, not impossible, but difficult. And, I don’t know that I will have the particular career that these women have (though, it would be nice), but as I saw a mother struggle to say goodbye to her husband and children in pursuit of furthering her career, I felt peace about my situation. Perhaps, God is has not given you what you desire because He has a plan that you cannot imagine. And, for that plan to work for His Kingdom, He needs you to be where you are. I have separation anxiety just saying goodbye to my parents and my nephews and niece; it would be heart-wrenching to be torn from my own husband and children. I am not ready for that. And, God knows it; now, He has allowed me to know it and it gives me a sense of peace. I still do not know the “what” in particular, but I feel that I got a glimpse at the “why.” Ms. EV Can God brag on you? Are you sure you would want Him to? If we look at the book of Job, it should challenge us to ponder whether God could confidently tell Satan to try us and see if we would turn away from God. I think if most of us are honest, f course, we want God to be proud of us, proud enough to tell anyone about us. But, if you read the story of Job and see the pain, grief, suffering and loss he went through, how many could still say, "Sure, God can brag about me."?
Job lost his means of income and still didn't turn from God. We might curse someone out (occasionally using God's name to do it) if we're just having a bad day at work. Jo lost all of his children, and he grieved, but did not speak ill of God. When we lose a loved one, or a loved one is sick, some of us will stop going to church or stop praying because we feel that God has let us down. Job got boils all over his body, and still trusted God. Some of us stub our toe and let it ruin our day. Or, if we get a bad diagnosis, we think God has abandoned us instead of asking Him how we can use our situation to bless Him and to bless others. So, could God brag on you? Could he take His hands off? Could you pass the tests of adversity and still praise God? Or, would Satan not even bother to mess with you because you're already his? Ms. EV I was awakened from my nap by a rather boisterous thunder boom. I groggily sat up in my bed and looked out the window just in time to see a flash of lightning that didn’t look to far from my house. I jumped up and hurried out of the room to make sure that anything that wasn’t plugged into a surge protector was unplugged from the wall, especially my precious laptop that has been charging while I was recharging.
As I sat on my couch, I turned on the new to see the local weatherman, Captain Obvious, telling me there were severe thunderstorms. The lightning was striking what seemed to be inches from my condo and every single thunder clap shook my whole house. So, I did what any sensible thirty-four year-old would do, I called my mommy. She laughed at me and told me that she was eating dinner and it was just a thunderstorm. I played down how scared I actually was in the moment. There are a couple of trees near my window and I started thinking, “What if one of these trees crashes through my window?” It was just me and my cat, Joy Bella, huddled on the couch waiting for the storm to pass. Then, the power went out. It went out in such a way that I was sure lightning had struck my electronics despite the surge protector, so I called my mom again. She assured me that the power would come on again very soon. When I hung up, I had a moment. All I could think was, “This would be a good time to have someone here with me to comfort me.” I mean, I couldn’t leave the house because the weather was so bad. Then, the storm brought cold weather and thoughts of how nice it would be to snuggle up with someone I love. That same thunder and lightning that were scaring the mess out of me would have been romantic in a different circumstance. And, there I was again thinking, “Lord, why don’t you want me to have someone special in my life?” A little while later, I picked up my guitar and started playing some new songs I had written. I soon forgot the lonely feelings. Then, during my quiet time, I read Romans 9 and the last verse really touched my heart, Romans 9:33 (The Message), “If you’re looking for me, you’ll find me on the way, not in the way.” It was as if God was saying, “My Love, I know you are seeking me and I know that sometimes you feel lonely. But I’m here. And, as long as you look for Me, you will find Me. I am not standing in the way of you being in a relationship. I just want you to enjoy our relationship. Enjoy the moments when it is just you and Me. Everything will work out in the best way possible because I love you.” He is not IN the way, but I can find Him ON the way in every moment that I feel scared and alone, or joyful and excited. He is always there, and if you look for Him, you will find Him; not in the way as a stumbling block, but on the way as everything you need. Ms. EV “Is there anything to gain from losing?” After watching the three football teams I love lose this past weekend, that was the thought in my mind this morning. I was trying to formulate an article for NFLFemale.com as the Official Fan Reporter for the Jacksonville Jaguars and once again, I found myself grasping for something positive to say about the team’s latest embarrassing loss. “There must be something positive that comes from this type of adversity,” I thought. Fortunately, today was the day when I would read Romans 8 as part of my devotion time.
I still didn't come up with much positive to say about the Jags, but God opened my eyes and my heart to how losing can really be a sign of winning. Romans 8:17-18 (MSG) says, “We go through exactly what Christ goes through. If we go through the hard times with him, then we’re certainly going to go through the good times with him! That’s why I don’t think there’s any comparison between the present hard times and the coming good times.” The rough times of life--the times when we give our all, but circumstances do not seem to go our way--those times are going to happen. In those times, we may feel like losers. But, as joint heirs with Christ, we will go through suffering because this world is not our home. In times of suffering, we can still have peace in knowing that there are better times ahead. And, this is not about the temporal “good times” the earth has to offer; this is about eternal peace and prosperity. If you are saved, no matter what trials you go through on this side of Heaven, NOTHING can separate you from the love of God (more Romans 8 wisdom). Every loss that you endure is worked out for your good by the God that you love (more Romans 8 wisdom). You just might lose “your life,” you know, the life you thought you would have by now. I know that I have lost mine. I thought I would be sending my youngest baby to pre-K this year, working as an entertainment attorney, and being a loving wife to my fabulous husband. That was the life I envisioned, and when I stack that life up against my current life, the world might call me a loser. But, I’ll take that loss in exchange for the peace in knowing that a mighty and powerful God holds my life in His hands and He always wins. And, because I am His child, when I surrender and lose myself in Him, I am a winner; not just now, but forever and ever. So, yes, there is plenty to gain from losing, maybe not for my team, but certainly for the child of Christ. I am a LOSER! I am lost in the depths of God’s love and in the height of Jesus’ sacrifice and in the breadth of the Sprit’s wisdom. Losing! Ms. EV I love football! I went to two games this weekend and managed to sneak in another during the commercial breaks of a Lifetime movie and once the movie was over. Friday night's game was arguably one of the most important regular season games for the football team of my alma mater where I also teach and have two nephews on the team. The first half was miserable. Our team looked like a completely different team than the one that had rolled over all, but one team in the preceding weeks. Then, just before halftime, the ball was thrown to my oldest nephew and he got a much-needed first down that led to a touchdown before the half.
After our team got within two points of the opposing team in the fourth quarter and blocked a field goal to give themselves a chance for the win, my nephew made two more spectacular catches to get the team within field goal range with 18 seconds on the clock. However, the kicker had missed two field goals that night, so the offense decided to go for the touchdown. The offensive line did their best blocking of the night, the quarterback dropped back, my nephew waited for the ball to go in for the winning score, but the QB threw the ball towards a receiver that wasn't expecting the ball and the defense intercepted it. They lost a district game, making the road to the playoffs more difficult, but not impossible. Saturday night, I saw that my team was winning, so I watched my movie and then turned back to the game to watch the fourth quarter. The opposing team gave a slight scare, but once they were off of the field with little time remaining, I figrure the game was over and my team had won, so I turned the TV off and went to bed. I woke up the next morning to find out that they lost by one point. Yesterday, I went to an NFL game. My team seemed to be on the right track for the first half, but they got killed in the second half and suffered an embarassing loss. It was not a great football weekend for my teams. Last year, while actor Charlie Sheen was doing some really odd and self-destructive acts, he was known to say the phrase, "Winning!" which was a contradiction to what he was actually doing. After seeing these games, I began to think today, is there any way that an apparent loss could be a win? Then, as I was reading this morning I saw several verses that assured me that losing down here is not what matters; what matters is what we gain when we lose. Romans 8:8-9 (MSG) says, "Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God, ends up thinking more about self than God. That person ignores who God is and what he is doing. And God isn’t pleased at being ignored. But if God himself has taken up residence in your life, you can hardly be thinking more of yourself than of him." When we lose ourselves and focus on God, although the world might not see the powerful acts of God that are going on, our lives will be infinitely better. When we fully surrender and submit, giving complete control to God, that is a win! We can see life change for the better, whichis not to say that there will not be challenges, but in the end, we win! Last year, our high school was defeated in the regular season by the same team they lost to on Friday, but when they got to the playoffs, they beat that same team to advance to the state final four. Life on earth is the regular season. We are going to take some losses. Some days, those losses are not our fault; they are caused by others not giving us the chances to win. Other losses are near misses because we were so close to the win, but we did not play through the end. Sometimes we lose because we just plain stink at life. But, this life on earth is the regular season and heaven is our championship. If we can make it through the tough times down here with our focus on God and His Spirit in our hearts, confessing Jesus Christ as our Lord and Saviour, we can turn losing into winning! Ms. EV In tomorrow's blog, I will continue this subject with more wisdom from Romans 8 God is still speaking to me this week. Today, His provision was through Scripture, support, and a supplement. The Scripture is Romans 4:3-5 (MSG):
“What we read in Scripture is, “Abraham entered into what God was doing for him, and that was the turning point. He trusted God to set him right instead of trying to be right on his own.4-5 If you’re a hard worker and do a good job, you deserve your pay; we don’t call your wages a gift. But if you see that the job is too big for you, that it’s something only God can do, and you trust him to do it—you could never do it for yourself no matter how hard and long you worked—well, that trusting-him-to-do-it is what gets you set right with God, by God. Sheer gift.” “Trusting Him to do it is what sets you right with God…,” those words stood out to me as if God was whispering in my ear, “You cannot do this on Your own, just trust me.” Within hours of this revelation, several prayers were answered. They were answered in such rapid succession that I was overwhelmed. I was just trying to take in all that God was doing in a matter of moments. I was getting answers to prayers that I have been praying for months. I was overrun with God’s wisdom and so thankful. I am a huge believer in “be still and know that I am God,” but that doesn’t make it easy to wait for answers. But we don’t show our faith by jumping up and trying to make things happen for ourselves. We show our faith when we wait for God to work it out because we know that the job is too big for us. That is what sets us right with God. Upon receiving the support and supplement, I was tempted to move forward in my own direction. I was tempted to take the easy path, but that was a path that I had control over. So, I prayed for wisdom to do what was right with God’s blessing. And, for the first time in a long time, I received an immediate answer and I obeyed. I took the step of faith that I believe God was asking me to take and I am trusting that He will lead me in the right direction. I would be more specific, but, honestly, I don’t feel led to give the specifics right now. Just know that God hears you. He knows what you desire and what you need. And, when you trust Him to do the things that you know you cannot do and obey His Word and His promptings, He will provide. I was looking for an old picture, and after I found it, and several pictures of my oldest nephews and niece that nearly brought me to tears, I ran across an old journal. I thought I would read through a couple of passages, but almost an hour later Joy Bella (my cat) and I were still in the spare bedroom sitting on the floor, as I wrapped up a glimpse into my past. Sometimes, it’s nice to look back. When I was looking at the pictures, they brought back memories of really happy times (of course, because no one would put sad pictures in a photo album). As I read the journals, I had mixed emotions. I call them journals, but they were actually prayers. As I looked over these outpourings to God, I was grateful for how far He has brought me. I was delighted at how much I have grown as a person and in my relationship with Him. But, I was also saddened because the dreams that I had almost a decade ago have fallen by the wayside.
The sadness I felt could have resulted in a couple of things. I could have thrown a huge pity party celebrating my non-achievements and biggest failures. Or, I could use it as a moment to figure out where I went off course. I chose the latter, although, I was tempted by the former because I am the world’s greatest pity party planner. I have heard my pastor preach that we can compare looking in the past with driving. When you are driving, you have a rearview mirror and side-view mirrors. Those mirrors are helpful for figuring out if it is safe to change lanes, or if you’re lost, you can look in the rearview mirror to see what you’ve past and it gives you a sense of where you need to go or if you need to turn around. Nevertheless, we must notice that the rearview mirrors, and side-view mirrors, while helpful, are never larger than the front windshield. So, while we may glance back or to the side, our focus needs to remain on what is ahead of us. That is what I learned when I looked at those prayers. During the time I wrote them, I was so busy looking back at the loss of my “dream” relationship and looking around at what others had that I lost sight of my dreams and goals. I began to pursue a career that, though rewarding, took me further and further away from what I truly love to do. Then, even after I grew so close to God, I focused on a relationship that felt like what I had been waiting for, but ended up leading me into disobedience. I focused so much on my ex and took on his dreams and goals as my own, that I let go of my dreams. And, though I was troubled by that, and the devil wanted me to feel defeated, I chose to be appreciative of the fact that God has allowed me to see another day, so that I can get back on track. God has a plan for each one of our lives, and our success is not as much about reaching our destination as it is about what we learned along the way. I know that I got off track and I could probably already be in the midst of something greater. I know that I settled for good when God still had His best for me, but I learned, and now, I am stronger, wiser and better suited to be who God desires for me to be. It would be really hard to drive, if we only looked in the rearview mirror, but a glance back can help guide us to what is ahead and I praise God in advance for wherever He is taking me. Ms. EV PS: Another good piece of advice I heard from my pastor: we have to stop saying that God is our co-pilot; God should be in the driver’s seat! |
About Ms. EVWhen you have elevated values, it is not about being snobby; it is about living victoriously! Archives
March 2016
Categories
All
Copyright Notice© Toni L. Wortherly and Ms. EV's Blog, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Toni Wortherly and Ms. EV's Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Ms. EV's Blog by Toni L. Wortherly is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License. |