For single people, friends often become an integral part of everyday life. Whether our friends are from work, school, the neighborhood, our childhood, they each have their own purpose and place in our lives. Some are there for support, some are around for fun, and some keep us accountable to God. But what happens when your life and your friends don't match anymore? How do you decide who to hold dear and who to let go?
As children of Christ, there may be times when we realize that as we grow in Christ, some people who were once close, do not understand our growth. Do we continue to allow those people in our lives? Do we allow them to mock the faith that we hold dear? How do we tell them that we are changing and this is no longer acceptable? Can we make them understand that we still love them, but we love God more? These are real questions...that I am praying about. What I do know is that as much as I love my family and my friends, when it comes down to it, NO ONE is there for me like Christ. No one loves me like He does or shows me mercy like He does or is faithful like He is to me. It is human nature that we will let each other down, and that is forgivable, but it is not acceptable to allow any "friend" to pull you down, or to push you back into a place from which God has delivered you. Real friends will understand that. Ms. EV
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Last year, on New Year’s Day, my pastor preached a sermon titled, “On the Edge of Greatness.” With so much lately about going over the edge of a fiscal cliff, feeling like I am on the edge of something great from a ministry standpoint, and a couple of personal situations, this sermon came to mind. The spiritual nugget that I took from the sermon was a football analogy that pastor used (how apropos since I am a HUGE fan of the pigskin). He talked about how when a team is on their fourth down with one yard to go. (Wait, let me stop here, if you don’t understand football, this might not make sense, but I would be happy to explain the game to you, just drop me a line). Anyway, when a team has fourth down and one yard to gain for a first down, many times they pitch the ball to the running back about three to five yards back. What this does is allow the blocking to be set up and allow the running back to gain momentum, so that he can get through the defenders.
As a spectator, this play always looks wrong, but it is so awesome when it works. My pastor explained that sometimes, when we are on the edge of greatness, God has to take us back, so that we can move forward with momentum. On New Year’s Eve, I performed three of my songs during our service. I was surrounded by love and support from the congregation and I truly felt, for the first time, that I was on the edge of greatness. I felt like people finally understood what God is doing in my life and how I pray He uses it for the uplifting of His Kingdom. When I got home, I found out that my ex had been fired from his job. For a minute, in my loneliness, I thought I should reach out to him. I felt awful for him because I know that this job is his dream job and that, as I was wishing others a happy new year, he was probably not having a great day. Then, I took a step back mentally and emotionally. I remembered what our relationship was like and I remembered that although, we are both good people, we do not have the best time communicating with one another. So, what would be a nice sentiment from me might not be well-received. If it was well-received, and if he appreciated my concern, it might lead to more than just a step back. I might take my focus off of my goal completely and try to help and support him. Taking that step back, gave time for my defenses to be set up. I realized that I cannot afford to turn back, not when I am on the edge of greatness. So, I prayed for him and every time I think about him, I pray for him that he is able to continue to live his dream. I also prayed for me that nothing would slow down my momentum. I would hate to get to heaven and see that I was one step away from my dream when I turned my attention to something else. It is not easy to stay focused because I have more than one dream, but it is necessary to keep moving forward. And, when I come up against a tough situation, I have to take the time to allow God to take me back, so He can set up my blocks and propel me forward. Sometimes the things that stop us from being where God wants us to be are not bad things (or people). In fact, I think that good tasks, people, projects are far more dangerous to our paths than bad ones. With bad things, you know you should turn around and run the other way, but with seemingly good things, it makes you question if you should gun it up the middle or pop outside to the edge (another football reference). Then, as you hesitate, you might miss the opportunity that God has in place to move you forward into greatness. So, whatever path God has you on in your life, even if you haven’t reached your goal, stay the course. He will work it out for your good if you love, trust and obey Him. Ms. EV I was scrolling through my Facebook news feed yesterday reading through all of the New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day sentiments. I saw one post that said, My “New Year’s Solution (not resolution),” and I thought, “Well, I don’t know who originated this, but that was exactly my approach to last year.”
I am not big on resolutions because they are usually broken by the end of January. You know the ones: I am going to quit smoking, quit drinking, I am giving up on this man or that woman, I am going to start exercising more, start eating healthy, start reading my Bible everyday. We make these grand statements of improvement as resolutions and basically set ourselves up for failure. I know there are some people that keep every single resolution every year, so just assume I am not talking to you. Last New Year’s Eve, I had planned to go out with a friend, but she called and said she wanted to stay in for the night. So, I looked for things to do because I was determined not to ring in the New Year alone. I scrolled through the internet, Facebook, Twitter, trying to come up with some event that was not too expensive, too far away, and would not make me feel too awkward because I would be alone. Eventually, I realized that I would be spending the night alone. I laid in the middle of the floor and cried to God, “How long is it going to be like this?” And, when it felt like I had run out of tears, I cleaned up my face and started journaling. It was something that had helped me through some other rough patches in my life and 2011 was a rough, and I mean rough, year. In fact, 2009-2011 had been really bad and I just wanted to move forward. So, I said, “God, what are the real problem areas of my life?” I know I could eat healthier, exercise more, complain less, and that would fix some external things, but deep down, I needed to know how I ended up in the middle of the floor bawling my eyes out on New Year’s Eve, so I didn’t ever end up doing that again. So, I wrote down what was truly making me miserable last year: grief, hurt, bitterness, fear, trying to control everything. But, that was just one step of the process. You see, at the beginning of the year, we are really good at identifying the problem, but we need solutions. So, for everything that was causing pain in my life, I thought of a solution. I thought of something with which to replace it. I made little notes for my bathroom mirror, so that when I lost touch of my solutions I would have reminders each day. It sounds corny, but it works. Last night, I was home alone again after church. It was an awesome service full of love for God and each other. But, you know when I hit the door, the devil hit me with the, “That was nice, but now what? You’re still alone; just you and the cat ringing in the New Year. Have fun with that.” It affected me for about a nanosecond until I thought about all of the love and support I had received and I thought about how much better this year has been than the three preceding years combined. Why? Because everyday, I have been working on solutions. So, at 11:55, I turned off the television, I picked up my guitar and I played one of two new songs that God blessed me with just yesterday. I played and sang in the New Year. First, I sang my new song, Soul Satisfaction, and then, Amazing Grace. I sent my “Happy New Year!” messages, answered a few back, said my prayers and went to bed at peace. There is nothing wrong with making changes in the new year. I pray that the first solution you consider is Jesus Christ. If you are not saved, He will truly change your life when you surrender. If you are saved, He will truly change your life if you surrender. (Yes, I meant to say the same thing twice). If you don’t know what the solutions are, God will help you find them if you ask. What is going on internally that is causing external bad habits? Because, until you find the solution to the spiritual or emotional mysteries in your life, any physical changes you make may last for awhile, but will eventually be in vain. It is my prayer that you have a 2013 that allows you to experience the fullness of God because He is the ultimate New Year’s solution! Ms. EV |
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