Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Thirty Two All We Need Is Love Scripture: 1 John 5:2-3 This is how we know that we love the children of God: by loving God and carrying out his commands. In fact, this is love for God: to keep His commands. And His commands are not burdensome… Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “If you don’t love God’s people, then you don’t love God. If you profess to be a child of God, then you are one of His people that you have to love.” I try to get out of the house every once in a while just to be sure that I don’t become a complete hermit. Sometimes, it is easier than other times to be in public by myself. Most times, I am perfectly comfortable getting a meal or even watching a movie alone. Being alone is a part of my life and I have grown to value this time of singleness. Then, there are the times when being out in public by myself is terrifying and painful. Fortunately, those times are not nearly as often as the enjoyable times, but when they come around, I have found that I need to take a deep breath and get back to the basics. What are the basics? I have to remember that the key to fulfilling my purpose here on earth is obedience to God. In fact, that is how I show God I love Him. I mean, let’s face it, there is NOTHING I can give to God. He owns the Universe. All He ever asked us for was love. He commanded that we love Him above anyone or anything. And that love is shown when we obey Him and love His children. Many people make living this life so much more complicated than it has to be when all we have to do is love. This is not about romantic love. This is about something much deeper. This is the kind of love that causes you to take a leap of faith even though you are scared out of your mind. This is the kind of love that makes you show compassion and mercy towards people who are malicious and hateful towards you. This is the kind of love that makes you look in the mirror each day and shout praises for being fearfully and wonderfully made. All we need is love. We do not need some magic formula. We do not need a conference or convention. We do not need a strategic, hook-up plan. We need love. We need to love God first. We need to love ourselves. We need to love others. It’s just that simple. Once you start pouring out love from your life, more love is poured back into your life. That is not to say that you should go around doing good deeds because you want to benefit in some way because then, you have the wrong motives. But, just live in obedience to God each and every day. If you stumble, don’t stay there; ask God for forgiveness and keep moving forward in love. The bottom line is God is love. And, God is all we need. Everything else in life falls into place when He is at the center of it all. Choose to love and you choose live the good life, even in the rough times. It is a love that will never fail. Prayer Thank You, God for Your example of the right way to love. Please forgive me for not showing my love for You through obeying Your commands. Lord, please help me to show love to the children of God and to love myself even when I feel unlovable.. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated.
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Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Thirty One Who Says You’re Not Good Enough Scripture: Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “I have had the occasion to think that I was the bottom of the barrel. I wasn’t pretty enough; I was book-smart, but not street smart enough; I just wasn’t…enough.” People who know me now would never know that, for most of my life, I struggled with self-esteem issues. If I am being honest, when I look back at my relationship mistakes and failures, many of them stemmed from the fact that I undervalued myself. Growing up, I was tall and lanky. In kindergarten, I was scolded by a teacher because she thought I was supposed to be on the big kids’ playground, not the kindergarten playground. It seemed like I was about a head taller than everybody else. To exacerbate the situation, I had some health problems and was quite sickly, so I was ridiculously skinny. And, I had eczema, so when my skin wasn’t dry and flaky, I had scars from scratching all my itches. I was quite the awkward child. I had no fashion sense whatsoever. I was smart, but I quickly learned as a little girl (from my peers, not my parents) that intelligence is intimidating, not attractive. By fifteen, I had glasses and braces, and, needless to say, no boys were knocking down my parents’ door to try to take me out on a date. I made up for feeling inadequate by trying to outperform and out-achieve others. I was an honor-roll students, participated in plays, represented my high school on the mock trial team, and placed in our school’s pageant. I won scholarships, got into every school for which I applied for entry. The list went on and on because I thought that doing all of these things would make me feel like I was good enough. My parents made every effort to tell me how great I was and that I could do anything. Unfortunately, their praise and pep talks were drowned out by all of the negativity that perceived was coming from my peers. When I got older, and out of my very long awkward phase, the pendulum swung in the completely opposite direction. I went right past self-esteem into pure, unadulterated conceit. I was pretty and I felt pretty and people (meaning guys) started to notice. But, that inner awkward girl was ill-prepared to handle the attention gained by her cocky counterpart. I did whatever I needed to do to keep the attention because I thrived on getting attention. It wasn’t until recently that I discovered that the only One I truly need love from is my Heavenly Father. He is the only one that I should be working and living for, and not so He can give me praise, but at a testimony of praise back to Him for all He has done in my life. The reality is that, regardless of what we look like, how smart we are, how accomplished we may be, God, the Father, knew that spiritually, we were not good enough to receive His love. And yet, while we were still not good enough, He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, as a sacrifice for our sins to unite us with Him. He does this so that those who believe in Him can be good enough and live lives that are more than enough through Him, here on Earth and for eternity in Heaven. If He loved us that much, when we really were not good enough, who is anyone else to say that once we are His, we are not good enough? Is there really anyone’s opinion that matters more to you than God’s? Who said you were not good enough? Family? Friend? Enemy? You? Well, I have news for you, friend, God says, “You might be all messed up, but I sent My Son to clean you up before you even asked or accepted it, and I offered it because I love you.” You don’t have to get better, live better, or do better before you come to Christ. He accepts us as we are and heals and delivers us into being better. No one who claims to love you should ever make you feel that you are not good enough, including yourself. God does not lie and He said that you were good enough to love when He sacrificed His Only Son. Prayer Thank You, God for loving me before I knew how to love You or even love myself. Please forgive me for placing the opinions of others higher than Your opinion of me. Lord, please help me to know that I am loved and lovable despite what my circumstances look like. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Thirty Adjustments Scripture: Luke 8:48 Then He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.” Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “Convert your passion for being [married] into a passion for a stronger relationship with Christ, and you cannot go wrong.” Last summer, at the end of the school year, I treated myself to a massage. I am not a particularly girly girl, but I love a nice, relaxing massage and cleansing facial when they are in my budget. The massage therapist was going through her checklist of questions and asked me about back pain. I told her that I had been experiencing a lot of back pain for several months and had been getting massages as often as I could. I explained to her that about thirteen years ago, I was in four car accidents over a period of about six months. None were my fault. I was only driving in two of them. So, every now and then, my back starts to act up. She did her best with my massage and I felt a great deal of relief and relaxation, but she recommended that I see a chiropractor because she said something did not feel right. I followed the advice of my massage therapist and made an appointment at the chiropractor. I had never been and I was a little leery of what may transpire. The doctor asked me tons of questions, looked at my mobility, traced my spine, and told me that I should get an x-ray and come back in a couple of days. I did so, and he called me in to show me my x-ray. He asked if anyone had ever mentioned to me that I had scoliosis. I replied that my sister and I were advised at a very young age to stop taking gymnastics because our doctor said we had a slight curvature, but then, no other doctor had mentioned it. He went on to show me the ‘C’ in my spine that should not be there. He also pointed out how at the top of my spine, it is nearly straight where it should be curved. That happened in one of my many accidents. Then, we looked at my hips, which were twisted because of the curve in my back. I had been compensating for this genetic ailment and it resulted in several bones being out of alignment. Nearly every health problem that I had that year, including back pain, knee pain and headaches, could be traced to my spine being out of alignment. The doctor recommended physical therapy. I went for three days a week at first. I felt almost instant relief. Then, as time went on I went one day a week. Then, one day every other week. And now, I go when I feel out of whack or get a bad headache. It occurred to me recently that this episode with my back was not unlike how I approached my singleness. When I was first divorced, I compensated for being single by going out with people I had no business dating, but after a while, I cleaned that part of my life up and started building my relationship with God. So, I forgot that I had a propensity toward making bad relationship choices when I entered into my next relationship. Getting over that break up was more miserable than any other breakup. I became extremely negative about the prospect of having a successful relationship or even marriage. Some people made comments about my singleness, but no one is a harsher critic of me than me. I would say that I want to be in a relationship, but if I am truthful, I did not really believe it would happen. I thought I was too damaged, too undeserving to be loved. Then, it occurred to me that I needed to make some adjustments. I needed to adjust my spiritual walk and find satisfaction in Christ Jesus. And, I needed to adjust my thought life; I needed to stop doubting that God could send me the exact person for whom I have been waiting. Just like the chiropractic adjustments, I need to make a blatant effort to make these adjustments daily until they become a natural part of my routine. Then, as they become more natural, I may only have to make an adjustment every once in a while when I am really in pain and I need more than what comes naturally. The point is that we have to make a choice each day to be positive and full of faith. God has proven that He is faithful and able. We must adjust our thoughts and believe. Prayer Thank You, God for helping me make adjustments to my spiritual walk and thought life. Please forgive me for being overtly and subconsciously negative about what you can do in my life . Lord, please help me to stay positive and help my unbelief. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Nine Father Knows Best Scripture: 1 Samuel 22:20-21, 25 God’s way is perfect. All the LORD’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to Him for protection. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “…once we stop fighting our singleness, we can grow much closer to God.” I am surrounded by children constantly. At work, I have my students. On the weekends, I am around the children at church and my niece and nephews. One thing I have learned about children is that it is very difficult to stop them when they are determined to do something, even if the something that they are determined to do is dangerous. Some of us might resort to reverse psychology to try to get the children in our lives to do what we actually want them to do. Let’s face it, children, especially those of the teenage variety, would rather do anything other than what you want them to do. So, when you say, “You know what, it’s fine. Go ahead and do it,” it usually gives them more pause to think about what they are about to do. When the act was all rebellious and sexy, it was more attractive, but now that they have permission, it doesn’t seem as intriguing. Don’t get me wrong, the whole reverse psychology thing can backfire, so you have to be careful. Nevertheless, if it works to protect those you love, then it is worth it. I am actually not sure who is harder to stop from harming themselves, teenagers or toddlers. Have you ever tried to hold a three-year-old down that was determined to get away? The squiggle and squirm and scream. They know how to make their little bodies into dead weight, which makes them super difficult to hold on to, and the minute you let them go, they will do whatever it is that you told them not to do. As much as children can be difficult to corral, we older human beings are not exactly a walk in the park. I am so glad that I am not God. He clearly and plainly tells us what to do and what not to do, and like rambunctious toddlers or rebellious teenagers, we choose to do life our way. It is as if we are saying, “Lord, I don’t think You know what You’re talking about. I have a better plan.” Seriously! In the words of Dr. Phil, “How’s that working for ya?” We say we want God to be in control of our lives, but as soon as things aren’t going the way we want them to go, we try to take over and do things our way. Rather than accepting where God has us in our lives and praising Him for all that He has given us, we start squirming and squiggling and screaming, trying to get out of His grip. What we fail to realize is that the tight grip He has on us is there to protect Him. We ask God to protect us, but then try to tell Him how to do it. I cannot speak for anyone else, but this I know, God can and will do EVERYTHING He says He will do. God’s way is the best way. If I want His protection, He will be my shield. But, I, like many others seem to forget this when I am having a fit of rebelliousness or just plain having a fit. I try to fight everything that God is doing in my life instead of just pressing in to Him and resting in Him knowing that He has everything under control. How many things have you tried to do on your own that came out perfectly? I can think of none. We have a loving Father who promises life more abundantly if we will just live His way. He is so loving that He still takes us back after we try to live without Him. The truth of the matter is that we either trust Him or we don’t. I pray that each day we choose to trust in His promises because the Father knows best. Prayer Thank You, God for protecting me, even when it means protecting me from me. Please forgive me for not trusting that you know best. Lord, please help me to accept where you have me and when I get squirmy, squeeze me tight and don’t let go. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Eight Lost Keys Faith Scripture: Psalm 131:3 …put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “By faith, I believe that the [mate] with my desires will be made known to me, and you should believe that as well.” It was a normal day off from work, and I planned to go grocery shopping with my mom. I drove to her house, threw my keys on the counter and got in the car with her, so that we could pick up groceries. Our trip was pretty uneventful. We came home, unloaded and separated the groceries. I grabbed my bags and my keys from the counter and headed to the car. I had to visit some other stores because I hadn’t found all of what I needed. I made three more stops, grabbed lunch and headed home. I pulled in the garage, reached for my keys, which I naturally and subconsciously almost always throw in the cup holder, but they weren’t there. I had no worries. I had a spare key to get in the house. I knew the keys had to be in the car, so I unloaded my bags, ate my lunch, watched some television, and then, I remembered that I had never looked for my keys. So, I went back down to the car looked to see if the key ring had fallen in between the seats. I saw nothing. I thought maybe they fall out of my hands as I was hugging my nephew goodbye. Then, I tried to remember if I had actually grabbed them or if I had just thought to grab them. So, I called my mom. She did not see the keys at her house, or in the driveway. We tried to think of where they could possibly be. I revisited the parking lot, called all the stores I had been to, but none had my keys. I searched through the empty grocery bags, in the refrigerator, everywhere. Now, I should mention that I prayed about this. I asked the Lord to help me find my keys. And, each time I came up empty handed, I asked again. I did start considering what the loss of keys meant. First, I felt a tiny bit of paranoia because my name is on two of my key chains, so I didn’t want an unwelcome guest at my house. Then, I thought about an order that I had coming in the mail, so I needed the mailbox key. So, I went on about my day and when I got home, I started searching again. I still found nothing, but my car is really clean. I went to bed, said my prayers and asked God to show me the keys. I woke up to a phone call from someone who had found some keys, but they were not my keys. I called and asked my mom to look again, so she said she would. I called the post office to see how I could replace my mailbox key and the woman said it would be $25. I did not want to pay that much, but I would have to if I didn’t find my keys. Plus, I started to wonder about my safety again. Then, I started reading the devotions for the day. One was about resting in God. The other was about being specific in prayer. So, I prayed again. I said, “Lord, I really don’t want to pay $25 for a new key and I am trying to feel safe, even though, there is a small chance that someone could break into my house, but I know You will protect me. Can you please show me where the keys are?” I went to the car to search again, but found nothing. I came upstairs and looked in a bag that I had brought in days earlier (I was just grasping at straws at this point), but in the bag, there was an ornament with the word, “Hope,” on it. I looked through the grocery bags, and then, it hit me I hadn’t emptied all of the grocery bags, some things were put in the cabinet still in the bag. I threw open the cabinet door and pulled down the first bag I saw, but no keys. I looked up and saw another bag, as I pulled it from the shelf, I heard my keys jingling. I started jumping and shouting and dancing. So, what is the point of all of this? I have read and heard of mustard-seed faith, but I never really understood the concept. How could faith so small, a tiny glimmer of hope, yield results? I found out that mustard-seed faith is a lot like lost keys faith. It is holding on to the minute bit of hope that you have left that there is Something greater and Someone bigger than anything your eyes can see. How does that apply to singleness? Well, there is nothing in my life right now that indicates that I will ever have another relationship or that I will have the children and family I desire. Nevertheless, I cling to the little hope that I have that God does not mean for me to be alone and, in His appointed time, I will have the desires of my heart because He promised me that. By the way, I often try to figure out why things happen the way they do and I truly believe I went through this just so that I could write this devotion. So, whether it is mustard-seed faith or lost-keys faith, never let go of it. You will not ever regret believing that God can change your situation! Prayer Thank You, God for showing me what just a little faith can do. Please forgive me for every time that I have doubted that You are able to come through for me. Lord, please help me to quiet the voice of unbelief and to cling to my faith in every situation and circumstance. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Seven Control Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “If you want an instant self-image booster, stop giving away pieces of yourself to potential mates.” When I was younger, I loved Janet Jackson’s music. The first song I remember getting down to was “Control.” When I was 17, I did what people told me Did what my father said and let my mother mold me But, that was long ago…I’m in control! The song came out well before I was seventeen, but oddly enough, when I was seventeen, I made a choice that would change my life completely. I had graduated from high school and I was in my first serious, long-term relationship (okay, it had been four months, but when you’re a teenager, that’s long term). I really loved this guy and we were going to get married, but we had to go finish college first before we could actually get married. Now, I had vowed to God to remain pure until I was married. God had helped me out by not allowing me to have a real boyfriend until I was nearly an adult. But now, I was in a relationship that I knew would last forever and we were committed to each other; we just couldn’t get married because of school, so it was almost like we were married just not on paper. It’s amazing, as I write it, now it seems like a completely irrational justification for sin, but then, I think I truly believed it. I think I really believed that going to get married and being married were the same thing, so I broke my vow to God to stay pure. I put my relationship with my beau before my relationship with Christ because I was in CONTROL! Clearly, because I am writing this devotion series for singles, that relationship did not last forever. It took a while for me to regain control over my physical urges, which led to too many ill-advised relationships (one is too many, so don’t sit there and try to figure out a number). When I wrote Pray While You’re Prey, I was abstinent and vocal about it because, with God’s help, I had come back to my senses and chose to avoid sexual immorality, which is God’s will. And, just to be clear, premarital sex is included in sexual immorality. Nevertheless, as I stated in the book, I was not in any real relationship, so I had not been tested. And, when I did get into a real relationship again, I stumbled again. Why? Well, even though I was in control of my decisions, I clearly did not have control over lust and trust. The lust part is self-explanatory. I was, at the time, old enough to know that I should not put myself in a compromising position. But, older is not necessarily wiser, and sometimes, we think we know our boundaries and we can stop the inevitable at any point, but I am a witness that doing so is nearly impossible. Plus, when it comes down to it, I did not trust God. I had been in a four year relationship dry spell. I had finally met someone with whom I could see forever, and I did not want him to leave me. Had I trusted God, I would have placed the relationship in His hands and said, “Lord, Thy will be done.” But, I could not take the risk that His will was for me to be alone again, so I blatantly disobeyed God’s will in order to keep my man. Again, obviously, that did not work out too well because I am writing this devotion. Call me old-fashioned, but I do not think that men and women realize the spiritual impact of sex. We know the physical impact. We can most times calculate the emotional impact, but there is a spiritual impact as well that seems to be ignored. For me, submitting to the lust of the flesh caused significant spiritual damage. I did not think that God would or could love me again, but I am so glad that I was wrong. Not only does He love me, but now I have truly placed Him in control because the only way for me to control my body is with His help and His guidance. Abstinence is not impossible with God. Surrender control to Him and He will help you through this time of singleness and temptation. Prayer Thank You, God for being willing to take control over my life. Please forgive me for thinking that I could handle physical urges and passionate lust on my own. Lord, please help me to be wise enough to avoid compromising situations and to trust that You know what and who is best for me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Six The Workout Scripture: Philippians 4:13 I can do all this through Him who gives me strength. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “There are times when we need to be all by ourselves, so that God can get through to us. I am still learning to accept that.” At least three or four times a week, I see a Living Social or Groupon offer for a discounted workout opportunity. There are usually offers for yoga or Pilates classes, or maybe a 5-week boot camp, or some even offer for you to pick a combination. I have never really been an athletic person. I love watching sports, but the fact that I hate sweating pretty much hinders any actual playing of sports. I have come up with pretty much every excuse in the world as to why I do not work out. I have gone through different weight cycles in my life. First, I was a stick figure until I was about 22. Then, I got married and gained about 20 pounds. Then, I got divorced and I lost 185 pounds (that’s a joke; you can laugh). I actually lost about 25 pounds. It’s amazing what stress, not eating and going to the gym way too much will do. Eventually, when the whole divorce was settled and I was comfortable in my own skin, I gained back the weight I had lost, plus some. Every time I gained weight again, it got more and more difficult to lose it and keep it off. Eventually, I just decided on an acceptable weight and I figured out ways to stay as close to that weight as possible. In recent years, my body has given me the best excuses for not working out. Due to a couple of genetic conditions, I have to be very careful about how much strain I put on my knees and my back. I have to be very cautious not to become a complete couch potato, though because I do want to be as healthy as possible. During the school year, I make sure I walk very briskly around campus at least twice a day. During the summer, I make a weekly trip to the gym with my mom, so my muscles don’t become too weak. There is a combination of what we take in and how we exert our energy that keeps everything in check. I choose to be more vigilant about my food intake, others may choose to work out more, so that they can eat. It is not very hard to maintain physical fitness if one determines what he or she can do and is willing to do to stay in shape. Emotional fitness seems to be a little trickier. I have had three really big breakups, and, just like my weight cycles, each time a major relationship ended, it was more and more difficult to bounce back. I have discovered, though, that emotional strength and physical strength are both byproducts of what you take in and how you exert your energy. When I would take in what society expected for me as a woman, i.e. how to dress, how to talk, how to look, how to date, it was overwhelming. When I spent all of my energy just trying to find the next man who could be my husband, it was exhausting. There were times when I thought I would never survive being single. However, when I started getting a daily diet of God’s Word and started focusing my energy on using the gifts He had given me, I started to feel stronger and stronger. I still have some down days, but those are the days when I need to do a little more intense workout; I need to pray more, read more, listen more. I have read Philippians 4:13 all of my life, but in my seasons of singleness, it has had more relevance to me than in any other times. Where I am weak, God is strong, so as I continue to use His Word and prayer to emotionally and spiritually workout, He gives me the strength I need to make it through each day. He helps me to not focus on singleness, but on the work He would have me do for the Kingdom. Just like I don’t care to sweat in a physical workout because it makes me feel yucky and gross, there are times when I don’t feel like being alone and I am mad because I feel yucky and gross, but being alone is exactly where God needs me to be, so that I can live my best life. He needs my focus and attention, so that I can be fruitful and fulfill His purpose for my life. So, He will give me all the tools I need, if I will use them, to gain the strength it takes to keep pressing. And, He will do the same for you if you will allow Him to lead your emotional and spiritual workout. Prayer Thank You, God for accepting me as Your own, and as such, giving me everything I need to survive. Please forgive me for paying more attention to what others think I should have or what I think I need. Lord, please help me to listen to Your voice and to engage in emotional and spiritual workouts when I am feeling weak. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Five Masterpiece Scripture: Galatians 5:25-26 Since this is the kind of life we have chosen, the life of the Spirit, let us make sure that we do not just hold it as an idea in our heads or a sentiment in our hearts, but work out its implications in every detail of our lives. That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: "I am working for God and myself, not wearing myself out for someone else. That may sound selfish, but if you’re single, this is the time for a little selfishness. You always keep God first, and He will make sure that you are not crossing the line between being a little selfish and totally self-centered. So use your "me time.'" Every artist hopes to create a masterpiece; that one original work that will no doubt make the world stand still and notice. It is a work so original that no one will dare compare it with any other because there is nothing of its kind. It stands alone and is taken just for its own beauty, its own decadence, its own wonder. No matter the medium every artist tries over and over again until he or she has finally made the piece of work that defines his or her talent. And, an artist is fortunate if he or she has one masterpiece, but some of the greatest creative minds have more than one. God, the ultimate Creator, has many masterpieces; too many to number. Anyone who finds his or her fulfillment in living the life that God has for him or her is one of His masterpieces. As such, as the Scripture suggests, each of us is an original. There is no comparing my life to your life. There is no time for that. There is time, however, to explore every intricate detail of ever unique quality that God has given you…especially, if you are single. God has sewn each of us together in such a particular way that when we tap into the greatness for which He has called us, we can be an amazing asset to this world and more importantly to the Kingdom of God. However, we get so caught up in what others are doing, what gifts they have, what talents they possess, or what people surround them, that we downplay how marvelous God has made us. We must stop comparing. If we choose to live a life led by the Spirit and really work every detail of our lives according to His plan, then we have to trust that He has given us what we need in every moment of every day of our lives. We must not yield to the temptation to say that another of God’s masterpieces is greater or has it better because they have something that we desire. We must focus on our own mission, our own imprint in this world, and the impact on society that God has chosen for us. The season of singleness gives ample opportunity for this exploration. Much like we would not compare works of Picasso to those of Beethoven because they are completely different genres, we cannot compare ourselves to another Christian, or non-Christian for that matter and say that God may one more special than the other. God knows every one of our capabilities and vulnerabilities and He is able to use it all for His glory. He can take each of us and make a masterpiece if we will surrender and only compare ourselves to the example of Christ, and not other people. Prayer Thank You, God for making me an original. Thank You for having a specific plan for my life. Please forgive me for comparing my life to the lives of others. Please forgive me for downplaying your ability to make me into a masterpiece. Lord, please help me to focus on being the person that you need me to be. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Four One Day I Stopped Asking Scripture: Isaiah 40:31 …but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “…if [we] will just talk to You, everything will be alright in Your time.” It seems like I have been thinking about not being single from the day I hit preschool. I still remember my first little crush at the daycare center. We chased each other around the playground, giggled and laughed with each other all day. I just always felt like I was not meant to be alone. In middle school and high school, I was just plain boy crazy. I prayed and prayed that God would send me a boyfriend. I was so boy crazy that, looking back, I am glad that I was nerdy and unattractive because if I had gotten the attention I so desperately craved from a guy, I probably would have given him anything he wanted in return. Fortunately, I was nearly an adult when I made the choice to disobey God and give away my virginity. That decision caused some pain and anguish, but not nearly as much as it would have if it had happened earlier in my life. While that decision was a bad one and it strained my relationship with God, I, eventually, got on the right track. I knew that I wanted to be married. So, I prayed and prayed that God would send me a husband. And, I thought He did. After all, I met my ex-husband at church. Nevertheless, I realized that my decision to marry him was a huge mistake. I was not waiting on the Lord so much as I was just waiting on someone to be willing to marry me. After my marriage, I slipped backwards a bit, but eventually found myself back in a place of obedience. I still wanted to be married; forever married. So, I kept asking and asking. And, I met someone with whom I thought I would spend the rest of my life. Then, I prayed and prayed to God to let him be the one. I asked God, correction, I begged God to let him ask me to marry him. That never happened and the relationship ended. I was crushed. At that point, I just wanted God to make the hurt go away. So, I started talking to Him and I started listening to Him. And, I am not sure when it happened, but one day, I stopped asking. It had been part of my prayers for so long, “And, Lord, please send me a boyfriend…a husband…someone to love me like you love me.” I had felt like once I had a mate, my life would be complete, but after spending time just communing with God, I finally realized that, with Him, my life is already complete. I didn’t have to ask anymore. All I had to do was waiting. And, in my waiting, He would strengthen me. Yes, there would be times when singleness would test my limits, but not to the point of disobeying God and trying to get Him to do my will. I learned to stop asking for what I wanted for me and what God wanted from me, so that I could get what I wanted. I started asking Him what He wants for me. And, I learned how to wait. I do not always like waiting, but I have been waiting for so long, and I have been blessed so heartily in the midst of my waiting, that it seems silly not to continue. We must know and trust that God knows and wants what is best for us. I still ask God for things, even occasionally for a mate, but it is no longer my number one prayer. And, I have certainly learned to wait for His answers to all prayers. Prayer Thank You, God for the wisdom to know that You know what and who is best for me. Please forgive me for trying to answer my own prayers rather than waiting on You. Lord, please help me to remember to ask that Your Will be done in my life, not mine. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Three Being Single Will Not Kill You Scripture: Psalm 118:17 I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the Lord has done. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “I honestly believe that loneliness is one of the devil’s favorite weapons. In my life, there hasn’t been a more powerful weapon.” They (the proverbial ‘they’ of whom no one really knows the identity) say, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” It is kind of a rallying cry for the stormy times of life. It is the comfort in knowing that a trial might take you to the brink of death, but on the other side of it, you will be better, wiser, stronger, and able to face even more challenges of life. I don’t know about anyone else, but there have been times when my life felt like loneliness itself would kill me. It did not feel like it would make me stronger at all. It felt like I was getting weaker and weaker by the moment. There was even a time in my life when I considered hurting myself, so that those I loved would have to surround. The possibility of death seemed, but a mere inconvenience to my plan. I felt that if I succeeded the loneliness would end because I would be surrounded by people who cared about my life. And, if the plan took a left turn and I did not survive, I would never feel the pain of loneliness again. I am well aware of how irrational that line of thinking was, but at the time, I was so depressed that it actually made sense. I truly considered letting my loneliness take complete control of my life. The interesting thing about that time in my life was that I was actually in a relationship at the time. So, one might be able to imagine how much more lonely it feels to be single. Even though, God had shown me in that instance that all I needed to know is that He is there for me, caring for me, and that He has my best interest in mind, there are still times when it feels like being single is going to be the end of me. There are times when I feel that if I am not touched, held, or caressed, I will just wither and die. There are times when I just feel the weight of loneliness bearing down on me so powerfully that it feels like I cannot breathe. But, every time that happens, I survive. What’s more is that I survive with a testimony. As the psalmist wrote, I realize that I will not die but live. Furthermore, I live to proclaim that being single will not kill you. It may seem like it will at times, but those are the times when we must press in to Jesus’ loving arms a little more. The times when no one will answer the phone or no one seems to be available to lend a shoulder on which to cry are the times in my life when I have experienced the most intimacy with my Savior, God. They are the times when I know He is there. They are the times that confirm that where my strength ends, His strength begins. It is okay to cry out to God in your loneliness. Even Jesus cried out to Him in His darkest hour. It does not mean that you will no longer be single, but He will give you what you need to feel able to keep pushing forward in the life that He has planned out for you. It will be a life that is full of more than you could imagine; a life that will bring glory to His name. You will live and not die. Prayer Thank You, God for showing me that being single will not kill me even when I think it will. Please forgive me for allowing my loneliness to make me think irrationally about how much You love and care for me. Lord, please help me to understand the purpose of this season and to live in that purpose for Your glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. |
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