Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Thirty Adjustments Scripture: Luke 8:48 Then He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.” Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “Convert your passion for being [married] into a passion for a stronger relationship with Christ, and you cannot go wrong.” Last summer, at the end of the school year, I treated myself to a massage. I am not a particularly girly girl, but I love a nice, relaxing massage and cleansing facial when they are in my budget. The massage therapist was going through her checklist of questions and asked me about back pain. I told her that I had been experiencing a lot of back pain for several months and had been getting massages as often as I could. I explained to her that about thirteen years ago, I was in four car accidents over a period of about six months. None were my fault. I was only driving in two of them. So, every now and then, my back starts to act up. She did her best with my massage and I felt a great deal of relief and relaxation, but she recommended that I see a chiropractor because she said something did not feel right. I followed the advice of my massage therapist and made an appointment at the chiropractor. I had never been and I was a little leery of what may transpire. The doctor asked me tons of questions, looked at my mobility, traced my spine, and told me that I should get an x-ray and come back in a couple of days. I did so, and he called me in to show me my x-ray. He asked if anyone had ever mentioned to me that I had scoliosis. I replied that my sister and I were advised at a very young age to stop taking gymnastics because our doctor said we had a slight curvature, but then, no other doctor had mentioned it. He went on to show me the ‘C’ in my spine that should not be there. He also pointed out how at the top of my spine, it is nearly straight where it should be curved. That happened in one of my many accidents. Then, we looked at my hips, which were twisted because of the curve in my back. I had been compensating for this genetic ailment and it resulted in several bones being out of alignment. Nearly every health problem that I had that year, including back pain, knee pain and headaches, could be traced to my spine being out of alignment. The doctor recommended physical therapy. I went for three days a week at first. I felt almost instant relief. Then, as time went on I went one day a week. Then, one day every other week. And now, I go when I feel out of whack or get a bad headache. It occurred to me recently that this episode with my back was not unlike how I approached my singleness. When I was first divorced, I compensated for being single by going out with people I had no business dating, but after a while, I cleaned that part of my life up and started building my relationship with God. So, I forgot that I had a propensity toward making bad relationship choices when I entered into my next relationship. Getting over that break up was more miserable than any other breakup. I became extremely negative about the prospect of having a successful relationship or even marriage. Some people made comments about my singleness, but no one is a harsher critic of me than me. I would say that I want to be in a relationship, but if I am truthful, I did not really believe it would happen. I thought I was too damaged, too undeserving to be loved. Then, it occurred to me that I needed to make some adjustments. I needed to adjust my spiritual walk and find satisfaction in Christ Jesus. And, I needed to adjust my thought life; I needed to stop doubting that God could send me the exact person for whom I have been waiting. Just like the chiropractic adjustments, I need to make a blatant effort to make these adjustments daily until they become a natural part of my routine. Then, as they become more natural, I may only have to make an adjustment every once in a while when I am really in pain and I need more than what comes naturally. The point is that we have to make a choice each day to be positive and full of faith. God has proven that He is faithful and able. We must adjust our thoughts and believe. Prayer Thank You, God for helping me make adjustments to my spiritual walk and thought life. Please forgive me for being overtly and subconsciously negative about what you can do in my life . Lord, please help me to stay positive and help my unbelief. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated.
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Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Nine Father Knows Best Scripture: 1 Samuel 22:20-21, 25 God’s way is perfect. All the LORD’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to Him for protection. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “…once we stop fighting our singleness, we can grow much closer to God.” I am surrounded by children constantly. At work, I have my students. On the weekends, I am around the children at church and my niece and nephews. One thing I have learned about children is that it is very difficult to stop them when they are determined to do something, even if the something that they are determined to do is dangerous. Some of us might resort to reverse psychology to try to get the children in our lives to do what we actually want them to do. Let’s face it, children, especially those of the teenage variety, would rather do anything other than what you want them to do. So, when you say, “You know what, it’s fine. Go ahead and do it,” it usually gives them more pause to think about what they are about to do. When the act was all rebellious and sexy, it was more attractive, but now that they have permission, it doesn’t seem as intriguing. Don’t get me wrong, the whole reverse psychology thing can backfire, so you have to be careful. Nevertheless, if it works to protect those you love, then it is worth it. I am actually not sure who is harder to stop from harming themselves, teenagers or toddlers. Have you ever tried to hold a three-year-old down that was determined to get away? The squiggle and squirm and scream. They know how to make their little bodies into dead weight, which makes them super difficult to hold on to, and the minute you let them go, they will do whatever it is that you told them not to do. As much as children can be difficult to corral, we older human beings are not exactly a walk in the park. I am so glad that I am not God. He clearly and plainly tells us what to do and what not to do, and like rambunctious toddlers or rebellious teenagers, we choose to do life our way. It is as if we are saying, “Lord, I don’t think You know what You’re talking about. I have a better plan.” Seriously! In the words of Dr. Phil, “How’s that working for ya?” We say we want God to be in control of our lives, but as soon as things aren’t going the way we want them to go, we try to take over and do things our way. Rather than accepting where God has us in our lives and praising Him for all that He has given us, we start squirming and squiggling and screaming, trying to get out of His grip. What we fail to realize is that the tight grip He has on us is there to protect Him. We ask God to protect us, but then try to tell Him how to do it. I cannot speak for anyone else, but this I know, God can and will do EVERYTHING He says He will do. God’s way is the best way. If I want His protection, He will be my shield. But, I, like many others seem to forget this when I am having a fit of rebelliousness or just plain having a fit. I try to fight everything that God is doing in my life instead of just pressing in to Him and resting in Him knowing that He has everything under control. How many things have you tried to do on your own that came out perfectly? I can think of none. We have a loving Father who promises life more abundantly if we will just live His way. He is so loving that He still takes us back after we try to live without Him. The truth of the matter is that we either trust Him or we don’t. I pray that each day we choose to trust in His promises because the Father knows best. Prayer Thank You, God for protecting me, even when it means protecting me from me. Please forgive me for not trusting that you know best. Lord, please help me to accept where you have me and when I get squirmy, squeeze me tight and don’t let go. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Eight Lost Keys Faith Scripture: Psalm 131:3 …put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore. Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “By faith, I believe that the [mate] with my desires will be made known to me, and you should believe that as well.” It was a normal day off from work, and I planned to go grocery shopping with my mom. I drove to her house, threw my keys on the counter and got in the car with her, so that we could pick up groceries. Our trip was pretty uneventful. We came home, unloaded and separated the groceries. I grabbed my bags and my keys from the counter and headed to the car. I had to visit some other stores because I hadn’t found all of what I needed. I made three more stops, grabbed lunch and headed home. I pulled in the garage, reached for my keys, which I naturally and subconsciously almost always throw in the cup holder, but they weren’t there. I had no worries. I had a spare key to get in the house. I knew the keys had to be in the car, so I unloaded my bags, ate my lunch, watched some television, and then, I remembered that I had never looked for my keys. So, I went back down to the car looked to see if the key ring had fallen in between the seats. I saw nothing. I thought maybe they fall out of my hands as I was hugging my nephew goodbye. Then, I tried to remember if I had actually grabbed them or if I had just thought to grab them. So, I called my mom. She did not see the keys at her house, or in the driveway. We tried to think of where they could possibly be. I revisited the parking lot, called all the stores I had been to, but none had my keys. I searched through the empty grocery bags, in the refrigerator, everywhere. Now, I should mention that I prayed about this. I asked the Lord to help me find my keys. And, each time I came up empty handed, I asked again. I did start considering what the loss of keys meant. First, I felt a tiny bit of paranoia because my name is on two of my key chains, so I didn’t want an unwelcome guest at my house. Then, I thought about an order that I had coming in the mail, so I needed the mailbox key. So, I went on about my day and when I got home, I started searching again. I still found nothing, but my car is really clean. I went to bed, said my prayers and asked God to show me the keys. I woke up to a phone call from someone who had found some keys, but they were not my keys. I called and asked my mom to look again, so she said she would. I called the post office to see how I could replace my mailbox key and the woman said it would be $25. I did not want to pay that much, but I would have to if I didn’t find my keys. Plus, I started to wonder about my safety again. Then, I started reading the devotions for the day. One was about resting in God. The other was about being specific in prayer. So, I prayed again. I said, “Lord, I really don’t want to pay $25 for a new key and I am trying to feel safe, even though, there is a small chance that someone could break into my house, but I know You will protect me. Can you please show me where the keys are?” I went to the car to search again, but found nothing. I came upstairs and looked in a bag that I had brought in days earlier (I was just grasping at straws at this point), but in the bag, there was an ornament with the word, “Hope,” on it. I looked through the grocery bags, and then, it hit me I hadn’t emptied all of the grocery bags, some things were put in the cabinet still in the bag. I threw open the cabinet door and pulled down the first bag I saw, but no keys. I looked up and saw another bag, as I pulled it from the shelf, I heard my keys jingling. I started jumping and shouting and dancing. So, what is the point of all of this? I have read and heard of mustard-seed faith, but I never really understood the concept. How could faith so small, a tiny glimmer of hope, yield results? I found out that mustard-seed faith is a lot like lost keys faith. It is holding on to the minute bit of hope that you have left that there is Something greater and Someone bigger than anything your eyes can see. How does that apply to singleness? Well, there is nothing in my life right now that indicates that I will ever have another relationship or that I will have the children and family I desire. Nevertheless, I cling to the little hope that I have that God does not mean for me to be alone and, in His appointed time, I will have the desires of my heart because He promised me that. By the way, I often try to figure out why things happen the way they do and I truly believe I went through this just so that I could write this devotion. So, whether it is mustard-seed faith or lost-keys faith, never let go of it. You will not ever regret believing that God can change your situation! Prayer Thank You, God for showing me what just a little faith can do. Please forgive me for every time that I have doubted that You are able to come through for me. Lord, please help me to quiet the voice of unbelief and to cling to my faith in every situation and circumstance. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. Pray While You’re Prey Weekly Devotions for Singles
Week Twenty Seven Control Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God Quote from Pray While You’re Prey: “If you want an instant self-image booster, stop giving away pieces of yourself to potential mates.” When I was younger, I loved Janet Jackson’s music. The first song I remember getting down to was “Control.” When I was 17, I did what people told me Did what my father said and let my mother mold me But, that was long ago…I’m in control! The song came out well before I was seventeen, but oddly enough, when I was seventeen, I made a choice that would change my life completely. I had graduated from high school and I was in my first serious, long-term relationship (okay, it had been four months, but when you’re a teenager, that’s long term). I really loved this guy and we were going to get married, but we had to go finish college first before we could actually get married. Now, I had vowed to God to remain pure until I was married. God had helped me out by not allowing me to have a real boyfriend until I was nearly an adult. But now, I was in a relationship that I knew would last forever and we were committed to each other; we just couldn’t get married because of school, so it was almost like we were married just not on paper. It’s amazing, as I write it, now it seems like a completely irrational justification for sin, but then, I think I truly believed it. I think I really believed that going to get married and being married were the same thing, so I broke my vow to God to stay pure. I put my relationship with my beau before my relationship with Christ because I was in CONTROL! Clearly, because I am writing this devotion series for singles, that relationship did not last forever. It took a while for me to regain control over my physical urges, which led to too many ill-advised relationships (one is too many, so don’t sit there and try to figure out a number). When I wrote Pray While You’re Prey, I was abstinent and vocal about it because, with God’s help, I had come back to my senses and chose to avoid sexual immorality, which is God’s will. And, just to be clear, premarital sex is included in sexual immorality. Nevertheless, as I stated in the book, I was not in any real relationship, so I had not been tested. And, when I did get into a real relationship again, I stumbled again. Why? Well, even though I was in control of my decisions, I clearly did not have control over lust and trust. The lust part is self-explanatory. I was, at the time, old enough to know that I should not put myself in a compromising position. But, older is not necessarily wiser, and sometimes, we think we know our boundaries and we can stop the inevitable at any point, but I am a witness that doing so is nearly impossible. Plus, when it comes down to it, I did not trust God. I had been in a four year relationship dry spell. I had finally met someone with whom I could see forever, and I did not want him to leave me. Had I trusted God, I would have placed the relationship in His hands and said, “Lord, Thy will be done.” But, I could not take the risk that His will was for me to be alone again, so I blatantly disobeyed God’s will in order to keep my man. Again, obviously, that did not work out too well because I am writing this devotion. Call me old-fashioned, but I do not think that men and women realize the spiritual impact of sex. We know the physical impact. We can most times calculate the emotional impact, but there is a spiritual impact as well that seems to be ignored. For me, submitting to the lust of the flesh caused significant spiritual damage. I did not think that God would or could love me again, but I am so glad that I was wrong. Not only does He love me, but now I have truly placed Him in control because the only way for me to control my body is with His help and His guidance. Abstinence is not impossible with God. Surrender control to Him and He will help you through this time of singleness and temptation. Prayer Thank You, God for being willing to take control over my life. Please forgive me for thinking that I could handle physical urges and passionate lust on my own. Lord, please help me to be wise enough to avoid compromising situations and to trust that You know what and who is best for me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen *Scripture quotations are from the New International Version ©1984, unless otherwise indicated. |
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