My parents have a Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes Greatest Hits CD and there is a song on it called, “Yesterday I Had the Blues.” I have no idea what the lyrics are, but the song is sung in such a melancholy tone and the chorus just repeats, “Yesterday I had the blues…” in this deep, depressing manner. Well, that is literally how I felt yesterday. Not all day. It was actually not until I got ready to go to sleep. I was talking to God, as I always do (not just before bed, but throughout the day), and, all of a sudden, I was crying.
I was so deeply saddened by my loneliness in that moment that I stopped talking and started crying out to God. Why does loneliness have to hurt so bad? Am I ever going to have my own family? Will there ever be someone lying next to me to hold me at night? Will I ever get to feel the safety of someone’s arms wrapped around me? Will I ever get to say silly things that only my husband understands? How long is this going to last, Jesus? And then, I took a deep breath, dried my tears and said, “I don’t know when or where or why or how or even what, but I know Who.” I still don’t know the answers to any of those questions today. But, I know Who does. I know that it is the same One who promised that all things will work together for my good. I know He has a plan for me. I know He will never leave me or forsake me. I know He will never put more on my than I can bear. I had to get up earlier this morning than usual and when I felt myself getting upset, I thought today would be a bad day. It wasn’t. It was actually a pretty darn good day considering I got little sleep and I am not a morning person. One of my friends even commented that I was smiling so early in the day and that it was scaring him. That’s what God’s peace does. It helps you say, “Yesterday, I had the blues…but today is a new day that God has made and I am rejoicing in it.” Ms. EV
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